Andrew
I stare at my hands, watch them slowly curl into fists. I'm grasping at something, someone, that isn't there. I'm still staring at my hands when the door slams downstairs, when a car door slams too. And two hours later I'm still staring. I think I'm in shock, maybe there's something wrong with me. I don't know anymore. I don't know anything anymore. I'm so lost in this coid that we call the world. I mean, just two hours ago I had a path, I had a purpose, but then IT happened and now ... I don't even know.
At some point I think I start crying, silent tears rolling down my face as I curl into a tight ball against the wall. I'm not supposed to feel like this. I'm not supposed to feel. I'm not supposed to feel when he's not here. I'm not supposed to be without him. I curl into a tighter ball.
There's a knock at my door.
"Andrew?"
I don't answer.
"Andrew, please. Please open the door."
I don't answer.
They leave.
I'm not anymore. I'm not me. I'm not us. Us. Us was with Neil. Neil is ... Neil is gone. I'm gone.
I reach for my armbands, reaching for the knives I know are there. There's one in my hand now. I'm fingering the edge, drawing blood. Not enough. Never enough.
A/N
Thank you all for reading. Again, I apologize for any errors.
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Tears (Foxes fic)
FanfictionAfter Neil's death and how the team reacts. Andrew's reaction. Kevin's reaction. And how they moved on. DISCLAIMER: This is unedited so I am apologizing for any mistakes in advance.
