Tears (Foxes fic)

Part 2

Kevin

Wymack left Andrew's room 10 minutes after he got there. He left immediately after, not stopping to even look at me. I stayed in the living room for a while, waiting for Andrew to come out and tell me what happened. Two hours later he still hadn't come out. I get up, making my way down the hall, listening for any sign of noise, or anything really, coming from his room.

When I've been standing in front of his door for 5 minutes and still haven't heard anything I knock.

"Andrew?"

Silence.

"Andrew, please. Please open the door."

Again, silence.

I don't leave, terrified of leaving Andrew alone when he's so passive. Something has to be wrong. Wymack had to have said something to him.

I'd been sitting in front of the door for five hours now, and still not a sound. I give up. I stand and walk back to the living room where I call Wymack.

"What did you tell Andrew?"

"Kevin? What are you doing up? It's three in the morning."

"What. Did you. Tell Andrew?" I repeat.

"Kevin go to bed." Then he hangs up.

I storm out of the house, not even caring about leaving Andrew alone. I don't stop at any traffic lights, I don't stop at any stop signs, I don't stop.

Wymack answers his door thirty seconds after I start pounding on it.

"Kevin," he sighs., "I told you to go to bed."

"Coach, what the fuck did you tell Andrew."

He opens his door wider, letting me step past him. He leads me to the couch and pours me a glass of vodka. He's avoiding the question.

"Coach."

He sighs again. "You already know."

"No. No, I don't," he looks at me like I should, "Andrew hasn't come out of his room. He isn't moving, he isn't talking. How the fuck am I supposed to know anything?" He stills at this.

"Andrew hasn't come out of his room?"

"No!"

"I told him to tell you."

"You're acting like you don't know Andrew, Coach," I state, "What did you tell him to tell me."

"Kevin, Neil--

At this I stand.

"Something happened to Neil. And you told Andrew to tell me!" I storm out. I guess I was right at being scared about leaving Andrew alone.

Back at the house I don't stop to do anything. I just run to Andrew's room and start knocking again.

"Andrew! Andrew, open the door!"

When he doesn't respond, I try again, "Andrew, if you're not going to open the door I'll break it down."

Still, silence.

I back up as far as I can and brace myself for the kick.

The door comes open easily, banging against the wall with the force.

Andrew is lying on the bed, playing with one of his knives. Another one is already lying, discarded, on the bed next to him, it's blade stained with blood.

"Oh god, Andrew," I kneel in front of him, "Oh god."

His face is tear stained. The covers under his cheek are still wet. I reach out to touch him, but stop myself just in time, my hands hovering over his wrists.

I don't know what to do. I don't-

I stay with him for the rest of the night and well into the day, my own grief forgotten. Andrew starts crying again and I can't do anything. I just sit in front of the bed, hoping my presence will be enough.

Sometime around noon the upperclassmen arrive. Banging around downstairs, looking for us. Renee is the first to find us. She looks into the room but leaves after seeing us, closing the door on her way out. I hear her telling the others where we are. She must've told them to leave us alone because none of them come to check. Renee comes back with two glasses of water, but leaves again.

The next day Wymack comes back. I can hear him talking with the others, who are still here. He comes into the room five minutes later. He looks at me, signaling that he wants to talk to me. I don't move. He sighs and sits down.

"Kevin, we need to make arrangements. Would you like to help?"

I don't look at him.

He sits there for a while before sighing again and leaving.

The upperclassmen come in then. Silently taking up places around the room. Dan and Matt take the beanbag next to the window, her holding him, and him shaking with sobs. Renee and Allison take a spot by the door, Renee looking sad but calm, and Allison staring stoically forwards. Nicky sits down close to Dan and Matt, looking hollow, like he's seen a ghost. Aaron stands by the end of the bed, a blank expression on his face. We stay in Andrew's room for the rest of the day. We don't speak, we don't move, we grieve together in silence. Eventually Renee goes to order some food for us, but none of us eat.