Collaborator Arc 4: Fade To End

Episode 7: Familiarity

(As Eva recklessly jumps from tree to tree, her blurry vision keeps her from reacting to a random branch sticking out and she trips mid air. She balls herself up as she tumbles and hits the ground. Keeping her position, she continually trips over more objects that keep her momentum going until she hits the side of a tree with her back. She bounces off and tumbles wildly for another several feet. A bit weakened, she struggles to stand and limps over to the edge of the forest. She finds herself on the border between Sylph and the center isle. After a few moments, an internal thought popped into her head.)

Eva: Boy…

Araru: …

Eva: Boy!...Hoffman!

Araru: What do you want, girl?

Eva: Are you able to hear my thoughts?

Araru: What kind of question is that? You think out loud. Are you even capable of inner thinking?

Eva: Answer the dang question!

Araru: Seeing as you cannot read my own subconscious thoughts, I do not believe I can read your conscious thoughts. We aren't bonded for that.

Eva: Good. Dismissed.

Araru: Who do you think you're talking to!?

Eva: (Ok, let's see if-) -I can do this.

Araru: Do what?

Eva: (Darn-) -it! (I'm-) -speaking out loud out of- (-habit!) Concentrate! 

(Having to stand completely still, Eva manges to focus just enough to keep her thoughts to herself.)

Araru: (Stupid girl. What does it matter if you think to yourself?)

Eva: (Okay...I think I've got it for now. I don't think I've had thoughts like these since I was maybe four. It's about time I tried to sort out my feelings. Like he said-) -l've- (-...been depressed. Slipped there for a second. I'm hurt now because I couldn't control my own emotions. No one else is here to help me so I can't afford to be careless anymore. I have to...consider my priorities better. I hate to admit it, but he was right. My way of thinking got me hurt.) Disgusting! (I don't like that he's right!) *Sits down* (But I'm afraid. What if he chooses to take me over again? In fact, why hasn't he? He said he would, but then just didn't...I don't understand, but I should keep a mental note of it. This world is so familiar, yet not. Then there's the animals, and that thing that just happened.) *Grabs her head* It's too much! (I'm wasting time and energy talking to him. Wasting my precious words and breath on that monster's anus.) *Sigh* (But I don't know what else to do. Maybe I'm thinking that talking to him is better than not anyone at all? Ugh, if that's the case, I really would rather end it all…..Ending it. Is it really the easy way out? I guess I don't understand the concept fully. But it's not like he will let me anyway. He wants me to suffer. I want to die, but at the same time I don't.) I wish I didn't feel this way! (Thinking about it, though, why should I have to be the one who dies? Shouldn't he? He did this! I need help! I can't do this on my own anymore! I'm too inexperienced!) I need help!!

Araru: I don't know exactly what just went on in your head, but there's nobody who will come to help you...You understand? It's just you and me, and that means it's just you.

Eva: Shut up! Leave me alone!

(Tears start to well up in her eyes, but she stops for a moment and quickly recomposes herself.)

Eva: (Control yourself. Don't let him have power over how you feel.) What you say doesn't matter to me anymore. You hear? My will, my emotions, are mine to control.

Araru: Good for you, girl. I couldn't care less.

Eva: There is one thing I've been wanting to say. I heard it randomly on my strolls, but Hoffman, you are the biggest as-!