xix.

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dear hoseok,

i am currently at a nightclub with my new girlfriend.
yes, you read that right.
girlfriend.
she's on her third drink and is quite tipsy.
im driving her home tonight.
i don't mind it really. she's very sweet and fun.
it's been an interesting night.
im in a nightclub like mentioned before.
can you imagine me here?
i know it's a shocker.
the thing is even if this is fun i can't completely enjoy this.
the music and dancing just remind me of you.
even if im here with her.
i asked her out about a week ago and to be honest with you im not sure why.
maybe im just getting lonely.
maybe i just want to fit in with the rest.
im twenty-two and have no social life whatsoever.
that's lonely.
im fucking lonely.
dont get me wrong she's everything you could ask for in a partner.
patient, sweet, caring...she's just not you.
im so sorry for what i did to you.
i wish i had a fucking time machine to go back in time and re-do what happened.
but it's not possible.
and now ive lost you.
i just want to be happier hoseok
i just want to be with you again.
i|

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