His Wife

Chapter 9

My son and his bride seemed compatible. I thought to myself as I stared at them from my table. I knew the reason for this union and I have to admit that I was not happy that it came about because of a pregnancy.

I did not however try to talk Julian out of his decision. When he came to visit and inform me of what had occurred I knew he was rational and grounded to do what was best and I knew also it would have been futile to talk him out of his decision, Julian was a stubborn one when his mind was made up and also he was not a rash individual.

I looked at them and the way he gradually got her to relax with a simple touch pleased me. I found myself relieved that my boy had finally found someone who he could love and who could love him in return. Even though they didn't reveal it yet, they were both tangled in it. I smile with pleasure at the thought.

As I listened to friends and dear colleagues of my son give jovial cheers after cheers to my son and his lovely wife as we sat and partake of the lovely array of Jamaican dishes and a bubbly MC I felt genuinely happy.

I thought back to the struggles he had gone through as a teenager when his father had walked out on us. The pain, the doubts, and the hurt. As the eldest, he had to grow up too fast and most of his life was spent looking after his sibling and me.

I am so proud of him. He stood by me as I fought hard the circumstances I face with the betrayal of my husband and my fight with diabetes. 

He ensured he set the best path for his younger brother now in his final year studying to achieve his Bachelor's degree in Computer science and Networking at the University of Technology Jamaica.

Yes, I was a proud mama. With nothing but hard work and determination to see my sons reach their best in this life that had crippled me in more ways than one.

Tonight was not about our past, but the present. The foundation was being set on another level and I was happy that I was here to witness it. 

I watched the two people who were now laughing shyly as they were about to kiss due to someone hitting their wine glass with their utensils.

A teasing chant of kiss....kiss...kiss was followed by an erupting array of cheers as the couple at the table leaned in for a kiss that would have been chaste if their feelings were less infused.

I was determined to see that they made it. My son needed a genuine woman who would love him for who he was and not what he had achieved. A woman who would sacrifice to ensure that he made it through times when bad seem to be the only circumstance. I knew Leslie would be that woman. I felt it in every bit of my being.

I had spent the hour watching her. The way she reaches for his hand whenever he places it on the table, the way she leaned into him whenever she becomes unsure. She trusted and adored my Daniel and I could tell she was already deeply in love with him.

"Mama, you ok?" Devon asked as he looked from his brother and his wife to me.

"I couldn't be any better my boy," I beamed. 

He smiled at me, his attractive face beaming with delight. "I must admit I am happy for Dan. He looks like a pleased puss."

We both laughed at the expression and I then looked over at Sonia who I realized was having too many glasses of wine much to the disgust of the younger man who sat with her.

"I however believe she does not share our feelings," I said using my mouth to point in Sonia's direction.

Devon turned to see who I was looking at and when he returned his gaze to me I could see his concern. In life, there is always that one decision, that choice that we would have to battle with and for us, it came in the form of Sonia.

I sighed and looked on to the MC who was about to take us on the final aspect of the reception.

"Well, well," he boomed. "Now that we have been well fed and family and friends throughout the dinner have been allowed to give their sentiments and well wishes to our beautiful newlyweds, we are going to ask the mother of the groom to have her dance with her son and the lovely bride her brother."

I took my walking stick and got up from the table proudly beaming as I made it slowly on my only good foot and the unaccustomed prosthetic. I had no care other than to dance with my darling boy who stood awaiting me.

I held him tight as he hugged me and we started to sway with his face resting on my head. If I died tonight I would be a happy woman. Sonia could see that happiness and it pleases me.

As if thinking about the devil I watch her rise from her chair, her body swaying under the effects of the liquors she has consumed. I felt the words that would send to her a warning form on my lips but they remained stuck, no sound or words came as the past like a whirlwind gripped me.

Twenty-five years ago I went to a church broken and defeated by pain and rejection and sat in the back pew. I looked up at the altar where the man who had broken my heart and my spirit stood beaming down at another woman. She was a young and beautiful twenty-seven-year-old thirty-two years his junior.

There was the man I love. That I had at eighteen married and gave two boys and twenty-two years of my life now marrying a girl that could have been our daughter.

Charlie Myers was standing there with that woman's hand held in his and was slipping on her ring finger a gold band that seems to glisten so brightly it appeared blinding.

Each word of the vow he spoke was clear and promising. It vibrated around the quiet church to nestle itself within my broken heart. A heart that had become black and hating. 

I stood there now a diabetic oversized, maimed, and bitter creature, a far cry from the eighteen-year-old he had wed. I heard myself shout words of hate, pain, despair, and anger. I cried then for what I had lost believing it was Charlie when in reality I had lost myself not realizing I still had a purpose.

I heard a husky voice saying, "Come mama," as another pulled on my skirt and cried calling out for me to stop.

I did not know they had followed me but as I felt myself being drained of all emotions like a silk press wringing every juice from grated cassava I realized these boys were who needed me. It was these boys and not Charlie that mattered.

"Charlie Myers,'' I had said then. "Yuh a callous man and I pity she. Chile he'll give yuh the same shit he's given me." 

When I walked away I was a renewed woman. I let go off my anger and I found my purpose not as a wife, but as a mother. 

I wanted Sonia to see my son's purpose. I wanted her to see how we had risen out of the slough that had befallen us when she took their father away. I wanted her to know that we had risen when she had lost because Charlie Myers was a man of his own heart, he was fueled by nothing but his own needs that were callous and bitterly selfish.

As the past cleared away I saw Devon and Marvin, their half-brother quietly walking her out of the tent. I knew that if the circumstances had played out differently I would be at fault. But I did what I did because I too needed a victory. If only their cold-hearted father was alive to see it.

I hugged my son and patted him on the back knowing that all I wanted was to be a good mother. To protect him and Devon at all costs.

"I love you, son," I told him as the song ended.

He laughed sweetly looking at me with adoration. "I love you too Mama."

We have both come a long way, my boys and I. It's just that unlike I Joycelyn Glave my boy was just starting his journey with love. As he took me to my table I prayed wholeheartedly for a more prosperous outcome for them than I was given.

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Sup, you ready for chapter 10?

It is not nice to see Mama warming to Leslie the way she does, even gathering a little victory from Dan's nuptials along the way 😊 ...thought mothers-in-law were supposed to be a sure gift from hell!! 😈

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