His Wife

Chapter 12

The clock in the reception area read 12:03 am. A whole day had already sped by. And that day had produced a marriage, a wonderful reception, and revelations that fused my world in a kaleidoscope of raging emotions.

I went straight to the bathroom undressed and stepped under the steaming shower. As the water beat against my skin, I felt drained yet my body craved my husband with a fierce hunger. I want Dan so badly that the water running down my skin heightened my need.

It's funny how often we claim to be in control when in reality life is the puppet master and we are the puppets whose strings are constantly being pulled.

When I had met with Daniel to inform him about my pregnancy I honestly at the time just wanted him to be knowledgeable of the fact. I had no expectations or any desire to foist myself in his life. The baby was all that mattered.

I just need this innocent being to know that he or she belonged. That it doesn't matter how he or she was conceived, he or she had a place.

I wanted my child to not have to wonder who his or her family members are, to have to cry at night when other children spoke about their father and he or she had nothing to say because he or she was just a seed that a random act of sex had planted. A child who existed out of mere conception.

I went to Daniel not looking for marriage, or looking to protect my reputation. This was Jamaica and in today's society children were no less if their mother was Ms or Mrs I went because I had wanted the cycle of my existence not to follow my baby.

I remembered how I had felt when my mother would walk around all pregnant yet again only to bring another baby home with no father to help nourish, nurture and guide them. Only siblings searching for an identity, a place to belong.

I remembered the night my eldest sister started liking a boy down in Penbrook that often came with the sound system that our mother hired to play at her Round Robin.

She was so happy when she found out the young selector liked her back. I was happy for her too as I believe being locked behind a bar was no life for a young and attractive girl.

That happiness was not long-lived. Their attraction for each other was discovered by the owner and head selector of the sound.

"Hey bwoy," he had said in the crowd when he had returned from talking to Allie, "You best leave dat likkle gal alone. Her mother was hot and heavy with Bassey when she deh get har in har belly an yuh know he is yuh Uncle, nuh tek no chance dat pickney could be your first cousin".

I remembered Allie's embarrassment. The way people in the crowd laughed and someone said.

"Lou di bwoy! yuh nuh hear seh cousin an cousin boil good soup."

I was so angry I shouted. "Yuh all close yuh dutty mouth and leave my sister alone!"

I took a beating that evening as I was said to be rude and feisty and not know my place as a little child. That beating did not hurt as much as my sister's rejection, because her lack of paternal lineage plagued her with shame and fear.

A part of her had broken down, never to be mended. Pretty soon Allie was carrying on with guys that came from other parishes to party in Ilene's Dance Hall and after their one night with her, they never came back as their sound would be heading on to other venues.

My sister's fear of finding a man in her community or those adjoining had caused her to become a hit for any outsider. The night she died she was once again pregnant with a child whose father was gone and no chance of another abortion as she had one too many already.

She had faced so many disgraces and most of them from a mother who was supposed to love and cherish her and protect her. Ilene was no such mother.

There was one occasion where she beat Allie for taking money from the bar to buy contraceptives. The things she had said and the names she had called her were nothing less than degrading.

As the memories unfold I cried in the shower until I was weak and listless. I wanted to cry all my feelings away and have them wash down the drain but life was never that simple.

I want more than just tears, I wanted the feel of Daniel deep inside me. I wanted him to drive away all the pain with the strokes of his impressive manhood. I needed him now. I want nothing else than to lose myself in his lovemaking and create memories that would drive away the dark dismal ones of my childhood.

I turned off the shower, slid the glass panel and stepped out of the enclosure. On the back of the door were two bathrobes provided by the Villa. I took the pink one down and slipped into it. From the space saver, I took a towel and wrapped it around my wet hair.

When I walked into the room the bedside lamps were on but there was no sign of Daniel. I wandered into the living room. He was not there either.

Where was he? I returned to the bedroom and took my cell phone from my clutch to WhatsApp him when I realized I had a notification indicating I had a message from him.

I sat on the bed, unlocked my phone, and opened the message. I read it through fast at first then much slower the next.

Leslie darling.
I am afraid when it comes to certain aspects of life I am no good. I have been fighting so long not to let life cripple me in any way that I made myself selfish.
That woman at our wedding reception that you asked me about was my father's wife. He had an affair with her then walked away from us when my mother found out about it. He did not provide for us in any way; it was as if we never existed.
Mama was diagnosed with diabetes and was going through a rough time and he just left her because my father is the type who believes a woman should always take care of her home, children, and foremost her husband.
She however could no longer do this as her sickness became worse. Father walked away without a second thought and I watched my mother lose her pride and dignity, then all care and hope when she lost her leg.
I could barely go to school as I had to find odd jobs and scavenged to take care of Devon and mama. You heard the story from Trevor.
However the bad gave way to good as true friends and caring neighbours helped us through. I finished High School and got through to go to Hong Kong to work in Technology and robotics but as I elevated myself I made a promise I would never allow the people I care about to suffer.
I failed in that promise because as I listened to you cry outside the bathroom door I now realized how my wanting you is now causing you suffering.
Darling, I care so much for you so quickly that I chickened out after we made love. Then you turned up telling me you're pregnant and I manipulated it to my benefit not thinking how this would affect you.
Whatever plans I put in place for our baby still stand, but if it's your desire we can have the marriage annulled. I promise I will do my endeavour best to be the father and man that our child can be proud of.
Know I have no regrets making love to you and also our reception was one of the best times of my life.

Yours truly,
JD Myers.

O Lord help me! Daniel thought I was crying because of him. He left because he thought he hurt me.

I quickly dialled his number as I was too impatient to text my reply. It did not ring, it went straight to his voice mail. I kept on trying until I realized it was useless.

I finally text.

Please call me as soon as you read this message. Thanks.

I waited until it was almost four a.m and my tired body lost all will to fight sleep even then no reply or call came.

*******************************************

Hey...☺ If you here that means you're really giving His Wife a chance and I thank you immensely for your support. 😍

Man, could things take a sharper turn downhill for Daniel and Leslie? A bit of advice
Communicate and Do Not Jump To Conclusion!

Vote and Comment your views 😊