Mario was driving his kart onto the trailer parking to his trailer.
Mario: [mimicking Bowser] First one to Mario Circuit gets Galaxy all to himself. Oh, we'll see who gets there first, Bowser.
Mario finds his trailer wasn't at its parking spot, and his driver, who happens to be his dad, Marco, pulled up.
Marco: Hey, kid! Congrats on the tie.
Mario: I don't want to talk about it. Come on, let's go, Dad. Saddle up. What'd you do with my trailer?
Marco: I parked it at your sponsor's tent.
Mario: WHAT?!
Marco: Well, he's you gotta make your personal appearance.
Mario: No, no! No, no, no, no, no, no! [The screen then shows a commercial on a TV screen inside the Rust-eze tent, on TV] Yes, yes, yes! Mario here. And I use Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment, new rear end formula! Nothing soothes rusty bumper like Rust-ezzzzzeeee. [A picture of a Rust-eze container moves across the rear bumper of a rusty car owned by someone named Jonathan Wrenchworths. As the container moves across, the bumper shines. Text appears saying "Actual results may take up to 36 weeks."] Wow! Look at that shine! Use Rust-eze and you too can look like me! Wa-hoo!
Rusty: [The commercial ends, and the screen zooms out to show some people in rusty cars in the Rust-eze tent. On the stage was the founder brothers Rusty and Dusty Rust-eze laughing] I met this guy who had a car from Swampscott. His car was so rusty he didn't even cast a shadow. [laughs]
Dusty: You could see his car's dirty undercarriage. [He crowd laughs, the screen zooms out to show Mario and Marco outside the tent entrance which has two Mario cardboard cut-outs. Mario was hiding behind one of them]
Mario: [sighs angrily] I hate people with rusty cars! This is not good for my image!
Marco: [to Mario] They did give you your big break. Besides, it's in your contract.
Mario: [to the team, to Marco] Oh, will you stop please? Just go get hooked up.
Dusty: Winter is a grand old time.
Rusty: Of this there are no ifs or buts. [While Dusty and Rusty were talking, Mario is hiding behind cardboard cut-outs as they enter the tent]
Dusty: But remember, all that salt and grime..
Rusty: Can rust your car's bolts and freeze your...
Dusty: [Then the cardboard cut-outs tilt over, exposed Mario to the people with rusty cars] Hey, look! There he is! [The people in the crowd then turn towards Mario] Our almost champ! Victory ran to your rear end in here, kid.
Person 1: Mario, you are wicked fast!
Person 2: That race was a pisser!
Person 3: Yeah, you were booking, Mario!
Mario: Give me a little room, guys.
Fred: You're my hero, Mr. Mario!
Mario: Yes, I know! [laughs as he reads Fred's name on his name tag] Fred, Fred, thank you!
Fred: He knows my name! HE KNOWS MY NAME!
[His jaw drops, Dusty and Rusty laughs]
Dusty: Looking good, Freddie! [Mario's and then get on the stage.]
Rusty: Thanks to you, Mario, we had a banner year!
Dusty: We might clear enough to buy your kart some headlights.
Rusty: Are you saying his kart doesn't have headlights?
Dusty: That's what I'm telling ya. It's just stickers!
Mario: Well, you know, race cars don't need headlights, because the track is always lit.
Rusty: Yeah, well, so is my brother's van but it still needs headlights. [crowd laughs]
Mario: [Does forced laughter]
Both: Ladies and gentlemen, Mario!
Fans: [A spotlight shines on Mario as the rusty cars remain silent with crickets chirping] Free bird!
Mario: You know, the Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment team ran a great race today. And remember, with a little Rust-eze... [Mario whispering to himself] Well, and an insane amount of luck, [normal voice] you too can look like me... Wa-hoo!
Rusty: [The people cheering as Mario and the whole of go into Marco's trailer] Hey, kid.
Dusty: We love ya. And we're looking forward to another great year. Just like this year! [One of the brothers laughs as Mario poses himself with a smile as the trailer door closes to show a picture of the same pose]
Mario: Not on your life. [Marco then drives away]
