Waluigi: [Then the screen skips to show the Toadtown Courthouse & Fire Department from outside as Waluigi's voice is heard.] The Toadtown Traffic Court will come to order!
Boo: [Then the screen shows inside the building as Mario and Luigi enter the courtroom, which most of the other Toadtown residents were inside and were angry with Mario for what he have done.] Hey, you scratched my kart's paint! I ought take a blowtorch to you, man!
Toad: [Then the screen shows Mario as he moves his tire up while getting pushed by Mater into the courtroom to the accused space while the team followed him.] You broke the road! You a very bad driver!
Yoshi: Fascist!
Wario: Commie!
Mario: : [to Waluigi] Officer, talk to me, man. How long is this gonna take? I gotta get to Mario Circuit, pronto.
Waluigi: Where's your lawyer?
Mario: [scoffs] I don't know. Tahiti maybe. He's got a timeshare there.
Waluigi: When a defendant has no lawyer, the court will assign one to him. [to the other residents] Hey! Anyone want to be his lawyer? [All of the residents move back, except Luigi.]
Luigi: Shoot, I'll do it, Waluigi!
[Luigi moves beside Mario and our heroes]
Waluigi: All rise! The Honorable Toadsworth presiding.
Toad: [Boo moves his kart's body up from his tires] Show Off.
Waluigi: May Toadsworth have mercy on your soul.
[The door bangs as Toadsworth comes in, which the screen shows him from his side as he walks to his bench. Mario gasps as he hears the door bang]
Toadsworth: Alright, I wanna know who's responsible for wrecking my town, Master Waluigi. I wanna his hood on a platter! I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots! No, check that. [Mario gulps. He gets on some stairs that move him up to the top of his bench] I'm gonna put him in jail till the jail rots on top of him, and then I'm gonna move him to a new jail and let that jail rot. I'm-- [notices Mario and the team, as Mario does a nervous grin] Throw him out of here, Master Waluigi. I want him out of my courtroom. I want him out of our town! Case dismissed.
Mario: Yes!
Luigi: Boy, I'm pretty good at this lawyerin' stuff.
Peach: [Then the door opens as Peach appears.] Sorry, I'm late, your honor!
Mario: [Mario and turn around to see her, which Mario instantly falls in love with her.] [to himself McQueen whispers] Holy rigatoni! She's gotta be from my attorney's office! [Peach then walks into the courtroom as our heroes turn back to the front.] [to Peach] Hey, thanks for coming, we're all set. He's letting me go.
Peach: [stops, and turns to Mario] He's letting you go?
Mario: Yeah, your job's pretty easy today. All you have to do now is stand there and let me look at ya. Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase. Me, you, dinner. [reflects sunlight on his bolt sticker] Wa-hoo! [The reflected sunlight shines on Peach's eyes; Peach groans, grunts] I know, I get that reaction a lot. I create feelings in others that they themselves don't understand. [stops reflecting sunlight, revs his engine. Peach groans] Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you?
Luigi: Well, a little bit, but I'll be alright.
Peach: Okay, I'm gonna go talk to the judge.
Mario: Do what you gotta do, baby. Oh, but listen, be careful. Folks around here are not firing on all cylinders, if you know what I mean.
Luigi: [Then we see Luigi, who is trying to reflect sunlight on his wing mirror like what Mario did with his bolt sticker earlier.] Ka-ching! [Then the sunlight goes into his eyes.] [Luigi groans]
Peach: [to Mario] I'll keep that in mind. [to Luigi] Hey, there, Luigi.
Luigi: Hi, Peach. [Then Mario's smile turn to frown.]
Peach: Hi, folks! [to the other Toadtown residents, walks to Toadsworth]
Everyone: Good morning, Peach!
Mario: [to Luigi] Do you know her?
Luigi: She's the town attorney and my Fiancee
Mario: What?
Luigi: [chuckling, smacks Mario with his fingers] I'm just kidding. She just likes me for my body.
Peach: Toadsworth, you look great this morning! Did you do something different with your glasses?
Toadsworth: What do you want, Princess?
Peach: [Peach sighs] Come on, make this guy fix the road. The town needs this.
Toadsworth: No. I know his type. Racer. That's the last thing this town needs.
Peach: Okay, I didn't want to have to do this, Toadsworth. But you leave me no choice. [to the other citizens] Fellow citizens, you're all aware of our town's proud history.
Toadsworth: [to himself] Here she goes again.
Peach: Toadtown, the glorious jewel strung on the necklace of Route 64, the mother road! It is our job and our pleasure to take care of the travelers on our stretch of that road.
Wario: [in voice] Travelers? What travelers?
Yoshi: [in voice] Ignore him.
Peach: But how, I ask you, are we to care for those travelers if there is no road for them to drive on? [to Toad] Toad, what do you have at your store?
Toad: Tires.
Peach: And if no one can get to you?
Toad: I won't sell any.... tires. I will lose everything!
Peach: Daisy, what do you have at your store?
Daisy: I have gas. Lotsa gas! [Luigi and Boo laugh on a joke with gasoline and gas from farts]
Peach: Okay, boys, stay with me. And, and, Daisy, what'll happen if no one can come to your diner for food?
Daisy: I'll go outta business and we'll have to leave town!
Peach: And what's gonna happen to all of us if Daisy leaves town and closes her diner?
Everyone: Without food, we're done for!
Toadette: What?
Peach: So, don't you think the one responsible should fix our road?
Toadette: The only guy strong enough to fix that road is Big Al!
Boo: Toadette, Big Al left, like, 15 years ago.
Toadette: Then why are you bringing him up, you lemon?
Peach: Oh, he can do it. He's got the horsepower. So, what do you want him to do?
Everyone: Fix the road!
Peach: Because we are a town worth fixing!
Everyone: Yeah! [all cheering]
Toadsworth: [blowing his own whistle, which represents banging a hammer] Order in the court! Seems like my mind has been changed for me.
Everyone: Yeah!
Mario: No!
Yoshi: Nice ruling.
Mario: [groans to Peach] I am so not taking you to dinner.
Peach: [giggles] That's OK, Stickers. You can take Bessie.
Luigi: Oh, man, ye get to work with Bessie, I'd give my left 2-Lug Nuts for somethin' like that!
Mario: Bessie? Who's Bessie?
