I thought the title was interesting, along with the cover. The cover was really pretty and the fonts matched well with the picture. Your description was also pretty good. I like how you gave an actual synopsis of the story, and it was interesting.
However I did notice some grammar errors. I noticed that you don't capitalize proper nouns. Like you write "park aera," when it should be "Park Aera." I think you might be doing this on purpose, but I'd suggest capitalizing names. This way, it's just more clear to the readers. There were also some parts where you put unnecessary spaces between periods and commas. You also don't put commas after quotation marks which is important. I also noticed that you tend to switch between past and present tense, I'd suggest sticking with past tense. Here are some examples of your errors:
Chapter 1 (aera) - [ "Hey aera so how did your day go" minjee asked in attempt to start a conversation but she stood there unbothered and oblivious to her friend. ]
Edited Ver. - [ "Hey Aera, how did your day go?" Minjee asked in an attempt to start a conversation. But she stood there unbothered and oblivious to her friend. ]
Here's another example in "remember me."
You wrote - [ "Jungkook i missed you " she soon bursted into a fountain of tears emotional after seeing her friend after 5 solid years. ]
Edited Ver. - [ "Jungkook, I missed you," She burst into a fountain of tears. After not seeing her friend for five years, she couldn't help being emotional. ]
Do you see the difference between the way you wrote these and how I wrote them? You want your sentences to make sense and have proper punctuation. This way, the story flows and readers can have an easier time reading.
These of course, are all just suggestions. By all means, you don't have to change anything if you don't want to. The plot is actually really interesting, and I'm interested in what's going to happen next. Thank you for letting me review your book author-nim!
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