College Fund

//It Was Downright Ugly-Messy//

Sage wasn't going to get her ten bucks.

As Eric was awkwardly shuffling his feet on Margaux's doorstep, my heart ached over his awkwardness and I knew I couldn't just say goodbye and leave him.

"Hey Eric," I began softly.

He glanced up. "Yeah, Butterfly?

"I have a secret for you." I gestured for him to lean in closer. As soon as his lips were in reach, I swooped in and kissed him quickly. Sure, it wasn't super romantic or anything, but from the goofy smile that spread across his face when I pulled away I could tell it meant a lot to him.

"Now Sage is going to have to give Margaux ten euros," Eric smirked.

"It's a small sacrifice for the greater good." I shrugged.

Eric turned as if he was about to leave, but at the last second he turned back to face me. "So what does this make us?"

"What?"

"What are we?"

"What do you want us to be?" The butterflies flooded my stomach, nervous about what he was going to say.

Eric shrugged, and shifted his weight from foot to foot. "I thought I made it pretty clear when I tried to kiss you at the Eiffel Tower, and I thought you made your opinions pretty clear when you pulled away. But then you kissed me just now, so I think you are the one who should explain yourself."

"Fair enough," I sighed. The thing was, I didn't know how to explain myself because I didn't know how I was feeling. Did I want to be with Eric? Yeah, of course I did. But was I really ready to commit to a relationship right now? "That's the thing, I just don't know how I feel."

"Well, that's frustrating," Eric replied. "You never know how you feel."

I forced myself to not get all insulted over Eric's comment. It was fair enough; clearly it was frustrating to be constantly receiving mixed signals from me, but he didn't understand that all the emotions I had been experiencing the past few months had left me more confused than I had ever been. "Can you just give me some time to think it over?"

"Yeah, sure." Eric slapped his hands over his pockets. "I hope you can think fast, though, because I'm going back to Canada in a few days, and clearly you aren't good at answering phone calls."

With that, he turned and walked away without looking back.

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"Cassidy? Is that you?" Margaux appeared around the hallway as I closed the door behind me.

"Hey," I said as I kicked my shoes off.

Once my feet were free, I lifted my gaze to reach Margaux's eyes and gasped. Margaux's light eyes were surrounded by a ring of dark mascara and tear tracks traced down her cheeks. She was wearing a fluffy robe and pajama pants and her hair was in a messy bun that wasn't cute-messy. It was downright ugly-messy.

"Margaux, what happened?"

"I think Spencer and I broke up." She sniffed, and pulled a Kleenex out of her pocket to blow her nose.

I immediately moved to her side and pulled her into a hug. "Oh my god, Mar. How did that happen?"

She walked from our place in the hallway into the living room and settled down on the couch. I followed suit. "He was texting me, and I-I got so mad. I've never been so mad at him before. And then he said things, and I said things and.... Maybe you should just read it."