Yeet Saga: Origins

The Yeet Saga Part 5

Now it was Mr. Clean's turn to fear, because there existed only one man on this god forsaken planet whomst is more sanatized than the bald monster:"Young Gravy." 

Mr. Clean state with a menacing tone, his plastic face still smiling somehow. 

 "Thas right, imma drop bars and flex on yo ass. Take yo hand, out that boy's pants." 

Mr. Clean sneered, kinda a smile sneer... a snile? Smeer? Idfk. "Fine."

He looked down at Ralph. "This isn't the end, buckaroo. I'll come for you." Mr. Clean gave a war cry, screaming something along the lines of "AIEE AIEE AIEE AIEE AIEEEEEE!" followed by a giant Magic Eraser™ Sponge sliding under his feet like a magic carpet. He sailed out the window rather majestically, a trail of suds following him and his mount.

Young Gravy walked over to Raflpht and begun to sang/rap. As the Alabamian ghetto notes graced the canadian's eardrums, he began to heal. Ralph looked at his crotch in amazement."What are you, some kind of bard?" Ralph inquired.

"I'd say that's a valid assumption/heal wounds like Cracker Barrel dumplin's" (clearly Gravy was still in bars mode)

"I see... whelp, time to go home." Ralph said as he hopped up, then yeeted himself out the window. 

"Shit, that wigga wildin'." Gravy said, looking out the window to see that Ralph is in Spider-Man's arms, swinging his way back to the apartment. "well shit, I seent it all now."

A few moments later, Spider-Man arrived at the location.

"Thank you for using Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man taxi service. We hope you rate us 5 stars on Uber." 

"Jesus Spidey, desperate for some cash huh?"

Parker sighed. "I tried stripping, but they got mad that I wouldn't take off my mask."

"What about that new Spider-Man game on PS4? Surely you got some cloud for that."

"Actually no, they only gave me a 2% cut because I wanted a unicorn spider costume and they wouldn't put it in."

"Well that's no reason to-"

"So I peed on all their laptops and wiped their hard drives!"

"What the TIT Peter!? Here just take your fare and go, gotdayum psychopath."Ralph pulled out a canadian nickel and gave it to him.

"Thanks pal!" He said, then web swung away.

Ralph walked through the door to the apartment, which Cairo had now repaired. Cairo turned around "Where the fuck have you been?! I made dinner four hours ago. Your corn and lemon chicken ramen is now soggy and cold. I even put extra sock pieces in it like you like it, you ungrateful fuck"

"I was in the hospital because of a STROKE you asshole!" Raft yelled, shaking his head.

"I don't fucking care you did that to yourself! I told you that you need to eat more greens, Ralph, but noooo you go through 3 gallons of mayonnaise and 5 of mustard a day. You think my billionaire ass can afford this shit!?"

"Yes."

"Oh... well you aren't wrong. Still, not like I enjoy i-"Young Gravy suddenly walked through the apartment door.

"Y'all my house got burned down can I crash here?"

Cairo's eyes lit up like a kid on christmas who just snorted 4 lines of cocaine before realizing he got a go-kart and a million vbucks. "YOUNG GRAVY!?"

Gravy replied "yuh"

"HOLY MOTHER OF MILKY ANIME TIDDIES! I am a MASSIVE fan! I have like, all two of your albums! And your merch!" Cairo began pulling out his fanboy stash, showing the mashed potato man his admiration.

"Yeah yeah, I get it..." Gravy looked over at the TV in the living room. "Well slap my ass and call me homo, is that Titanfall 2?"

Cairo inhaled with a happy gasp so deep his lungs began to explode. "You... yooouuu... PLAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?"

"yuh" the rapper said as Ralph just slurped his soggy sock-garnished noodles.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" Cairo squeaked as high as his voice could possibly allow.

But as things seemed to be looking up due to the white guy's appearance, little did they know, there was a party of fiends stalking the apartment grounds, waiting for the perfect moment to execute their ambush...