She & Him

Part 42: Moving Forward Sucks

Numb.

Ironically one can feel numb.

Numb normally means without the sensation of feeling or absent of thought.

Having to repeat what happened to every single cop in that police station only made the whole situation worse. Now, as I lay here in bed- having laid here awake all night- I dwell on everything.

Every detail.

Every moment of pain.

Every crack in my voice as I plead for him to stop.

Everything.

I remember everything, because they never stopped asking for more and more details.

Looking at the clock on my far wall- my blood shot eyes can barely make out the time, but it has to be about 7:30.

Work.

I have to be at work by eight. Fuck.

Sliding out of bed, I slowly and stiffly move my aching body across my room. Draco has somehow managed to stay perched perfectly against the doorframe all night: asleep.

How- I have no idea, but I do know his body is not going to like him today.

"Draco...." I quietly say as I place a hand on his cheek. "Draco..."

Slowly stirring awake, I looks at me and nearly loses his entire balance from a small stretch to realign his body properly.

"Wha....what time is it? What's wrong?" He's totally out of it.

"You fell asleep against the doorframe- you should get in bed." I hate to say it, but my voice has no emotion or real care to it- and it has nothing to do with no having slept all night.

"You should be in bed- you look like you haven't slept a wink." He goes to caress my cheek, but I involuntarily pull away. This obviously causes his face to drop.

"I didn't."  I bite.

"I'm sorry." Retracting his hand, he stretches and twists his upper body to get rid of the remaining pain. Turning back into my room, I rummage through my closet for something to wear to work. Long sleeves will at least cover most of the bruises. I don't know how well I can do at hiding the cut. "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like?"

"You're not seriously going to work today?"

"That's exactly what I'm doing. I have a job- responsibilities. I can't be staying home for no reason." Grabbing a grey skirt and white blouse- I head back out to the bed and set the items down before finding a new bra and underwear.

"There is a reason- you didn't sleep last night and..."

"And my used to be fiancé and best friend decided to become a raging lunatic- but the world is still spinning and therefore so must I." He closes the gap between me and the dresser. Gently holding onto my upper arms- Draco stops me in my tracks.

"Please- you need to rest. The world can survive one day without the hard work of Hermione Granger." Pulling away, I walk around him and open the top drawer- grabbing what I need and skirting back around him once more to the bed. "You're mad at me- I get it...."

"IT'S NOT ALWAYS ABOUT YOU DRACO!! STOP ACTING LIKE EVERYTHING STEMS BACK TO YOU AND YOUR ACTIONS! THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU!" I flame. I'm so upset my anger causes the mirror to crack near the top of the frame. The aggressive energy pours from me and yet I'm still not satisfied. "SO DO YOURSELF A FAVOR- GET A BLOODY SHRINK TO WHINE TOO AND LET ME GO ABOUT MY BLOODY DAY!!"