𝐆𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐞 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 // 𝐁𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐞 𝐄𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡

52 ⋆ 𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨𝙣'𝙩 𝙙𝙚𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨

billies POV

the drive back from the clinic was pretty silent.

my mom was in the front driving and lola and i had been in the backseat.

i decided to sit back here with her so she's not alone... and also, looking at the road makes me sick all of a sudden.

our hands were interwoven between us and i rested my head on the window and closed my eyes.

i'm so fucking tired

lola was starting out the other window. she had been pretty quiet since we started on our way back home.

more quite then usual

when the car stops and we pull up in the drive way, i bring myself to turn and look at her.

her hair was blocking her face kinda, so i couldn't tell if she was sleep or just gazing. but i noticed her reflection in the mirror...

her face was dim and her eyes were heavy as she looked downwards, i sat up a little and nudged her with the back of my hand.

"hey, what's the matter with you?" i ask her softly.

i furrow my eyebrows and when she turns to look at me she has a saddens expression on her face and she shrugs a little.

no response.

sometimes i feel like lola holds back things because she scared i might judge her or get upset.. but she should know that's not what i'm about at all.

i'm always open to what she has to say

i tilt my head and i watch my mom get out of the car, leaving just the two of us.

i fix my slouched position to turn and face lola, to which i put my other hand on hers.

"baby... what's wrong?" i ask her with even more concern and i furrowed my eyebrows, examining the way her shoulders slouched and her sigh.

my arm leans on the headrest of the seat, and i place my head in my hand. my eyes become more intense as i stare at the timid girl in front of me.

she lets out a shanky breathe as her eyes look down and study her hands. she peeks at me from the corner of her eyes with worry spelled out across her face...

"lola" i repeat myself. watching her closely.

"your gonna be mad at me"

"am not"

"yes. you are, billie..."

i sit up again and grab her knee to hold it gently.

that always makes her fall under me immediately.

she looks up at me

i remembered to always remind her i'm here even if she doubted it...

it's part of the promise we made eachother.

always make one another feel safe and secure

"i promise" i remind her. leaning my head forward and making that clear with my eyes.

she looks at me and breathes deeply through her slightly parted lips again...

"it's just..." she starts, shutting her eyes.

"it's so small billie!" she begins, gesturing with her hands like she does when she feels passionate about something..

"and cute, and just... tiny. and-and i know it's wrong to feel this way but i just... that's you! that's a little you in there!" she exclaims breathlessly.