Warbler Infections

Chapter 27: "Retail Therapy Anyone?"

Sunday October 24th, 2010
Jeff's POV:

  "I know you two only invited me to find out who I'm going to the dance with."

  Shit. Kurt caught onto our scheme far too soon. We were supposed to have a delightful afternoon at the mall searching for our formal suits while casually discussing his dating life. Luckily we had all found tuxes within the first hour of browsing racks. That gives me and Nick the chance to run if Kurt tries to strangle us for meddling.

  Nick spoke up, attempting to clarify our master plan. "So what if we did? You're Dalton's most eligible bachelor and the rest of us are dying to learn whatever we can." Kurt scoffed, not so subtly checking his phone for any incoming messages.

  "Speaking of", I chimed in. "You can hardly go ten minutes without waiting for Blaine to tell you about a new solo, a great episode of American Idol, or that he ran out of toothpaste. It's time to face the facts and admit that you're head over heels for him."

  He paused in the middle of the walkway, dramatically tumbling onto a bench. "What am I supposed to do? We're close but not enough for him to ask me to the formal. If I go alone I'll look pathetic, and if I go with someone else I'd be leading them on."

  Nick and I could see how distressed he had been about this. Kurt's been on edge about a lot lately. Last Tuesday he snapped at a lunch lady for not having organic applesauce available. At Thursday's Warbler practice he spent forty-five minutes glaring daggers at Trent for unintentionally stepping in his toes. He still had a mountain of missing assignments awaiting in his desk and hadn't visited his family in six weeks. Nobody could blame him for losing his temper.

  "Then you're going to ask him." I urged.

  "Have you finally gone insane Jeff? I could never handle that. Add putting together a huge song and dance flash mob in the middle of a library to the list of stuff I have to do." Nick looked back at me, of course, we were thinking the same thing.

  "We'll help out, all the Warblers will. But you don't necessarily have to put on a spectacle to get his attention. I know Blaine, and he's more into the simple joys of life. You could recite a cheesy poem to him while wearing a potato sack and he'd still say yes."

  Kurt rolled his eyes as always but considered his options. "Do you think I should? What if something goes wrong and I get humiliated in front of everybody?"

   I snatched his phone away, making sure he listened with no distractions. "Ask him privately. As Nick said, all he's going to be focusing on is you. Might as well leave out all the music and people when he won't be noticing them. Then it can be intimate, and if he says no, not that he will, you can easily recover."

  He beamed, nearly jumping over the balcony banister with his newfound confidence. "I can do this. It'll be the most romantic, well thought out, wonderful question that's ever been asked. And I think I already have an idea." He grabbed back his cell, tripping on the walk to his car.

   "Kurt Hummel's going to the formal!" He sang on the way to Dalton.

  I leaned over to Nick in the backseat so Kurt wouldn't hear us. "Do you think we should tell Blaine that Kurt's tux includes a kilt?"

  Nick nudged me jokingly, as we both snickered at the thought of Blaine's face seeing his roommate in a skirt.

  "Nah, let's keep that part a surprise."

  Hey guys! Wow, I managed a double update this weekend. I know this chapter is essentially a paragraph but I wanted to include some shorter moments since the formal will be coming up. I also realized I haven't written from Jeff's point of view for fourteen chapters. My bad. But I plan on posting next Sunday as well so catch up on the newest updates and continue to vote, comment, and add to reading lists. Have a great morning, afternoon, or night. You are surrounded by supportive friends.

You're fellow gleek,
  - Lindsay 💕