Tainted (Levi x Reader)

Chapter 5

Five months quietly slipped by, spent in daily training and daily paranoia as the flowers of spring melted into the richer greens of summer, and as summer relented to early fall. You thought nonstop about what your father might have planned next, and you dreaded another encounter with that hooded assassin.

Levi's words often rang in your head, bringing you guilt. My father is obviously still powerful and dangerous, and I'm sure I only pissed him off more. I don't know if even the Scouts could handle him. Besides, they have much bigger fish to fry.

Another expedition was coming up quickly. What if... what if I slipped away somewhere along the way? Maybe I could survive out there. I know father wouldn't follow me beyond the walls. He's psychotic, not stupid.

Then Ilse would come to mind. You'd be a coward and a dishonorable friend to abandon your promise to her so soon. So you stayed and stuck it out, keeping a watchful eye at all times.

The expedition came and went with more losses. By then you barely slept at night, and the constant strain of remaining alert took a toll on you. The stress dulled your appetite, causing you to skip most meals entirely and instead spend that time by yourself, training.

As winter settled in, a chill would creep into your bones every night from the weight you were gradually losing. You often wearily sat up against your headboard and watched the window in your room, which had been repaired soon after the abduction.

Levi had been keeping a close eye on you. Your sleepless eyes and absence at meals didn't go unnoticed. He'd already tried to intervene, with no success. It frustrated him more than he was willing to admit, being unable to help. He often wondered how Ilse would have handled you if she was still around.

Things were quiet until the following spring. You and your squad stayed behind at HQ when Levi and Erwin were summoned to the capital. There had been a titan attack on Trost.

It was frustrating having to stay behind, but an order was an order, and the soldiers still at HQ tried to be productive despite the tension they felt. The next day, two live titans were transported to HQ for experimentation, and Hange was over the moon about it.

"(Y/N)!" They grabbed both your shoulders a couple days later, when you had finally decided to see the captured titans for yourself. Hange's eyes glowed with euphoria. You winced at their tight grip and pried their hands off.

"(Y/n)! Meet Sawney and Bean!" Hange laughed, proudly holding their arms out in the titans' direction.

Two titans were heavily pinned to the ground with nails. Sawney, a blond-haired 4 meter. Bean, a brown-haired 7 meter. You studied their wide, blank eyes and heaving bodies and turned away in disgust. Beyond killing them, you had no interest in titans.

A week after Erwin and Levi's departure, they returned with a younger boy, all three galloping up to HQ on horseback. The newcomer had dark brown hair and vibrant green eyes.

Arms crossed, you waited alongside the rest of Squad Levi as they neared and dismounted. Levi briefly introduced the boy, Eren, and filled all of you in on the situation. You all followed Levi into HQ. He immediately ran a finger under a table, scowling as it came back with dust.

Your Captain turned to his squad. "You've all been slacking in my absence. I want this entire place clean, no one sleeps, eats, or so much as takes a shit until it is. Get to work," he ordered in a scary tone.

You were assigned to clean a room on the second floor alongside Levi. All was deathly quiet as you both focused on your work. You were sweeping the floor when the new recruit, Eren, walked in and announced he was done cleaning upstairs. Poor boy, he probably doesn't know the meaning of clean.

You ignored them as he spoke to Levi, then Levi exited, leaving you alone with Eren as the titan boy took over washing a windowsill. You weren't alone for long. Petra came in with another broom and struck up a monologue about how unsociable and strict our Captain is.

You stifled a chuckle at her words, but all of you jumped as Levi returned with a look of intent to kill. "Completely unacceptable. Do it all over again," he snapped at Eren.

~*~

That night, you sat around a table in the mess hall with your squad, drinking tea and discussing what Erwin might have planned. It was interrupted by a startling thump at the door. Petra opened it to reveal Hange, and that was cue enough for those of the squad who knew well enough to leave. All except poor, unwitting Eren.

As you made your way down the hall toward your room, you were stopped by Levi grabbing your wrist suddenly to get your attention.

As you faced him with questioning eyes, Levi frowned and took a minute to speak. "You didn't encounter any... trouble while I was away, did you?"

You shook your head, knowing that he was referring to the attack about a year ago. Levi's eyes seemed to reflect your thoughts. It's been quiet. Too quiet.

You surprised yourself by placing a hand on his shoulder and giving a soft smile, a sort of thanks for his show of concern. "It's been a year, Captain. I don't think they'll attack again," you lied.

Levi's eyes narrowed, not one bit fooled. "Do you, now? Then perhaps we'll see you more often at meals."

You tensed up and took back your hand. "I've been busy training, Captain. And with all due respect, your authority does not encompass my eating schedule."

Levi visibly clenched his jaw. "I want to help you, but you make it so damn difficult."

"I didn't ask for your help," you said coldly and quietly.

Levi blew out a deep breath to compose himself, then looked at you. He suddenly flicked your forehead in frustration. "From now on, you'll report to my office every day at noon. You will sit there and you will eat your lunch so I know that you have. Is that clear, cadet?"

You struggled to keep a lid on your irritation. "And if I refuse?"

"I'll have Hange pin you like one of their titans and force you to eat. I expect you at noon, don't be late." Levi gave you one last stormy glare and stalked off, leaving you to sigh and try to calm down the rapid beating of your heart.