Hand in Hand

8. Faith

The scouts rode in formation towards the titan forest, Erwin upfront, and the rest of the scouts in intervals behind and to the sides of him. They had been riding for a little over half an hour and were still not close to the Titan Forest. Luckily, only two five-meter titans had been seen and easily put down.

The sun was still high and beating on their backs and with every mile that they rode closer, their hearts thumped faster. (Y/n) rode slightly above Armin and Mikasa because she was of higher rank, but she could still hear them talk to Hannes about Eren.

"Mikasa, hey Mikasa!" Hannes shouted over the loud horses. "You're pushing too hard. You're riding into the vanguard, do you want to break the whole formation?" Mikasa mewled an apology and slowed her horse down a little. "You have got to chill out kid. Have you ever known Eren to go down without a fight? The poor brat's probably givin' them hell right about now."

"Yeah he's right," Armin agreed. "Hey, Mikasa? Remember when we were kids and Eren would always come to help me whenever I was being picked on? He'd keep fighting, even if it was one against three!"

A slight blush rose to Mikasa's cheeks at the memory. She knew that they were trying to distract her. She knew that all of her friends knew how she felt about Eren, even if she pretended to be oblivious. All her life, all she wanted was for Eren to know that he could depend on her, trust her, and maybe even love her. "Yeah, I remember."

"The poor kid would hold his own until you got there to scare off the bullies," Hannes said, laughing. "Even though he's always been a hot-headed little kid, he's never given up."

"He's right, Mikasa," sang Armin. "Have a little faith in Eren. You can't always be there to protect him so he has to learn how to fight on his own. Think about it. After everything that has happened up until this point, him learning about his titan abilities, Reiner and Bertholdt's secret being discovered, and us trying to figure out the truth of the walls, he's probably lost right now. We need to have faith in him so that he can have faith in himself!"

(Y/n)'s head perked up. She sucked in a small gasp. 'Have faith in him... so he can have faith in himself?'

She thought back to when she had first joined the Survey Corps. It wasn't her first choice. She had made the top ten in her training and was on her way to join the Military Police. It was Sabrina's ambitious attitude that persuaded her to join. Since they had been together since childhood, how could (y/n) say no?

Did her faith in herself die with Sabrina? The only other person who she had felt truly cared for her was Hanji. Moblit, Nifa, and her other friends within Hanji's squad were only comrades to laugh with around a fire. She worked closely with them but she couldn't say that she was actually close to them. She loved Sabrina, and she also loved Hanji.

Do love and faith go hand in hand?

She remembered what Levi had asked her the night they spent in the hotel. She slowed her horse slightly, just enough so that she wouldn't break formation but so that she could be closer to Mikasa.

(Y/n) turned her head around and asked her, "Hey, do you love Eren?" Mikasa's mouth dropped open and her eyes bulged. Beside her, Hannes burst out laughing and Armin stiffened on his horse, nervously averting his eyes.

"I'm only asking because if you love him, then have faith in him," she said. "Shit, I hope I'm not overstepping but since I'm your superior, technically, think of it as an order. Love and faith between two people aren't mutually exclusive. Just think about it." (Y/n) turned her head back around, a smug look on her face.

A small part of her couldn't believe she just said that to a person she barely knew, though it was cool to pull the rank card on the new cadets. The other part of her wished that she'd take her own advice. (Y/n) knew that, no matter what, she'd always have Hanji, but not in the way that Eren had Mikasa.

"Titan Forest ahead!" A loud voice boomed from the front of the formation, a green flare shooting high in the sky.

"Titan Forest ahead!" A closer voice repeated.

Everyone gripped the reins on their horses. (Y/n) eyebrows furrowed in concentration as she leaned forward on the saddle. 'I wish they wouldn't shoot off those stupid flares. They just attract titans,' she thought.

As they approached the Forest, two screams erupted from the left of the formation. A red flare was shot. (Y/n) shook her head, anger starting to build in her body. Her point was being proved. Another red flare shot up from the far right and she looked up to see a ten-meter titan with an MP in its hand. The person's body was split in two, hanging together by stringy guts, dripping red. A scout quickly shot its ODM gear, connected with the titan's body, and sliced it dead. She gulped and quickly looked back towards the cadets behind her. Even after four years, she still needed reassurance that she wasn't alone.

(Y/n) groaned and tightened her grip on the reins, her nails digging into her palms. 'Every single time I go outside the walls, it's just like before.' The titans that surrounded them fell to the ground, as skilled scouts began to slaughter. A titan for every cadet.

A piercing screech sounded from what seemed like miles ahead and (y/n) looked to the sky. A blinding flash of yellow and red struck down into the earth like a thick lightning bolt.

"That light..." Mikasa's voice trailed off.

"Someone's transforming!" Armin shrieked. "What if it's Eren?"

From the front of the formation Erwin yelled, "Cadets, we are out of time! Split into groups once in the Forest and head towards the light. We have until sundown!"

"(Y/n)!" Armin yelled. "Come with us. Our friends Jean, Sasha, and Connie are splitting up with us too."

She looked up front and noticed that Erwin and his squad had already headed into the forest using their ODM gear. (Y/n) nodded and they all rode into the Forest. She looked at a scout beside her from the Survey Corps and yelled, "Round up the horses once we're gone! Take them to the other end of the forest in case the Armored starts moving and we need to follow him!"

The scout nodded and watched as (y/n), Mikasa, Armin, and Hannes latched their ODM gear onto a tall tree and flew off their horses and into the forest, swinging from tree to tree, three younger scouts following after them.