Limbo

just go

5 hours already passed and I recieved notification.

Kylie: Our bench :)

I was more scared than before. Why would she put smile face there when she was angry? My hands started shaking, I quickly locked beach house and I was running to our new bench in Malibu. It wasn't far away, so I was there quite fast. I saw her sitting there with her hoodie on and she was looking at the ground.

"Kylie where have you been?" I got on my knees infront of her so I can have better view on her face. She looked devastated. Her face was totally red

"Go pack your stuff and Brandon with Margo are coming for you with car, they're on their way," she didn't look at me.

"What?" I stood up, "what does this mean?"

"Go," she raised her voice.

"What is wrong with you?"

She looked at me for the first time. Her eyes were different as they were this morning. She was weird.

"I cheated on you."

My whole world fell apart.
I could feel how my heart fell into my stomach. It hurt so bad in my chest.

"K-Kylie you are kidding right?" my voice was trembling.

"No. I was spending nights with someone else."

It started hurt more with every single word she said.

"You were pretending whole time?" I grabbed her necklace and I ripped it, then I threw it onto her. She was looking at me with teary eyes.

"I used to think of you as somebody that would never ever hurt me. Ever."

"Just go. I don't want you," she spoke the words slowly and precisely, her cold eyes were on my face, watching me as I absorbed what she was really saying to me.

I could feel in my stomach how butterflies I was feeling this morning just died.

"I've let this go on too long."

"Don't do this."

She was just staring at me, I could see from her eyes that is just too late. It's already over.

"You're not good for me, Grace."

I didn't know what I should respond to this nonsense. I couldn't believe this is real. I looked at her for the last time and I headed back to the beach house. I was crying all the way back, I don't even remember how I got there, it felt like forever.

I packed all my stuff and I could hear honking outside. It was Brandon and Margo.

"Honey what happened?" Margo asked. She probably didn't know.

"She cheated on me," I whispered.

"She did what?" Brandon asked immediately, "where is she?"

"That doesn't matter, just leave okay?"

"No, where is she?"

"On beach. Leave," my whole body was shaking.

"Let's go Brandon," Margo said, he started the engine and we were going home.

"Can I go with you?" Margo asked.

"No, thank you for coming for me. Bye," I quickly said and left the car.

I threw my bag in the corner of my room and I lay down on my bed. I was thinking about every single word she ever told me. How much she loves me. How much she wants me. How much I saved her or how much I mean to her. It was nothing. I'm nothing.
I didn't even close my eyes this night. I was thinking what I did wrong. Why?

Margo called me in the morning about 10 times. Sam did too.
I unlocked my phone for the first time today and she left our friends groupchat. She removed herself from all social medias.

Sam: Please let me in.

I peeked from the window and his car was parked outside. I decided to let him in.

"Grace, oh my god are you okay?" he hugged me tight.

"No," I said and I started crying very loud. I couldn't keep it inside.

"I was talking with Chris and he said she didn't come home yesterday or this morning."

"I bet she's with her," I said quietly.

"What can I do for you?"

"I don't think there's something you can do, but thank you."

"You know I would do anything for you," he wiped tears for my face.

"I know," I said and I smiled.

"I'll leave you now, but please be safe, don't do anything stupid," he kissed mu forehead and he left me standing there.

I don't have mood for anything. Nothing makes sense now. I just lost everything. Everything that was keeping me sane and alive. Why I'm even here if it isn't for her?
I have so many question in my head. And she isn't here to answer them. I just miss her perfect brown eyes. There's nothing I was afraid of when I looked into her eyes. And now they're black and gone.