IMPORTANT author's note at the end!
"Mama! I don't know what to wear!"
I sighed and went to by baby boy's room and saw he looked frantically through his drawers, I laughed softly and went up to him.
"Calm down baby."
"We're seeing daddy today! We didn't see him last week, he must be very sad!"
I forced a smile and nodded, "Then we can't keep him waiting, I think you should wear your new dinosour button up shirt, he might like it."
"You're right!"
After getting him ready, he quickly put on his shoes and waited for me by the entrance, "Come on, mama!"
"I'm going, I'm going!" I laughed.
We both left our apartment, his small hand gripped tightly around mine as he jumped around and laughed. We stopped in front of café by our apartment, he picked out three slices of chocolate cake and a cold milk. We walked slowly as he talked and talked about what he was going to tell his father once we get to our destination.
"Mama, should we get red roses? My teacher said that red roses mean love and I want daddy to know how much I love him and miss him!"
"Then we'll get red roses."
He picked out a bouquet of red roses and carrried them until we got to our destination. He let go of my hand and began running.
"Joon-woo, baby, don't run you'll fall."
I was able to catch up to him and saw as he plopped down in front of the tombstone and placed the red roses in front of him.
"Daddy! We're here! Sorry we couldn't come last week, I had to go to the dentist! But, look! Mama, said you'll like my new shirt, it has dinosours!"
I smiled softly as I watched my 7 year old son talk about what he did to the tombstone. I tried to hold back tears but I failed, catching the attention of Joon-woo.
"Mama? Don't cry! Daddy wouldn't like to see you crying!"
I laughed and wiped my tears away, "I'm sorry, baby."
"My teacher says that when someone passes away, they go to this place where they don't feel any pain and are always happy! Daddy must be there, right? If so, I'm glad he isn't feeling any pain!"
I looked at my son in awe, I smiled and nodded. "You're right, he's happy and at peace."
He showed me a big smile and sat on my lap as he talked and talked. After having some cake, he was fast asleep in my arms.
"He's grown so much ever since you left." I began softly, I looked at the Tombstone. 'Yoon Sanha.' "How long has it been? Two years? I feels as if it happened yesterday. The boys haven't been able to come since they're busy with their comeback. They miss you, they miss their maknae. But, I miss you more. I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I love you, Sanha, and I'll never stop loving you."
I felt a small hand hipe away my teas, I look down to see my son crying as well.
"I saw daddy."
"You did, baby?"
He nodded, "He said that he loves me and misses me, and he said that you don't look pretty crying."
I chuckled and hugged him close to me, "He says that you should be happy, To move on. What does that mean?"
"It means to keep going foward."
"Do you miss daddy?"
"Everyday?"
"Everyday."
"I miss him, too."
"Should we go home?"
"Can we go see uncles?"
"Of course."
He got and rubbed his eyes before hugging the tombstone, "Bye daddy, I'll come next week!"
I smiled at him and ruffled his hair, he grabbed my hand as we walked out of the cementary, it's been a diffult past two years but the reason I'm still going is because of my beautiful son...
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Helloo! GAAAH! I haven't been feeling well lately, emotionally and mentally... This quarintine hasn't done me any good and I just haven't been doing well.
My grades are dropping by lack of motivation and you know depression. So, um... I'm taking a break:)
It's going to be a small break just for I can be able to focus on my mental health and try to get myself back into track since this year is my last year of High School.
Also stay tuned because I might change my username since this one I'm using was when I made my account like 4 years ago. If so, I'll be updating everything with my new username.
Well is is goodbye for now, I'll be back with more imagines and new chapters for my new book and I'll see you soon.
STAY SAFE AND WASH YOUR HANDS
-エオス
