Not Some Princess ✓

28. Drunk with existence

28

Drunk with existence

Check my phone
I'm all alone
Ten missed calls
A couple texts
None of them are who I'm looking for
Who I'm looking for, yeah
This is a song for no one
This is a song for no one
—Song For No One
Shawn Mendes

THE HOUSE was empty like it had always been. And the fact hadn't changed much. Raymond scoffed as he saw the house looking just the same. Perfect. And decoy. It was faux. The personification of a lie. Beautiful and happy. Something his family never was.

He wanted to call his mother but he assumed she would be busy with her fashion show coming up. No, his mother was not a model. But she was one hell of a designer that models swarmed around like a flock of birds. And the kind that was in the magazines daily.

He knew his dad was out shooting for his next. His dad was rarely home. Well, so was his mom. Both were complete workaholics. And so was he. And ever since what happened with his sister his dad had started to wend wherever his work took him. One thing to ignore the guilt than to live it. But to escape it all together was another thing outright.

Raymond resigned to the living room sofa and sighed, he had no idea why his mind had conjured up to the idea of coming here. It seemed pointless.

"Junior master, you're home!" Mrs Pillsbury scurried towards him.

"Mrs Pillsbury." Raymond stood and hugged the maternal lady. He was already feeling a bit of calm in her embrace.

"What is it that brought you here? I know it must be something rather stupendous." Mrs Pillsbury's blunt words were something he rather liked about her. She wasn't fake. She said as it was.

Even when it tinged a bit.

Raymond cleared his throat and seemed at a rather knackering position since he didn't know himself why he made all the way to London in such haste that he had probably forgotten the line of reason back at the airport.

"Why, how indignant of me to start blubbering you with questions right at the moment of your arrival and that too after so many years! I will make something up for you right this moment!" She nodded to herself and turned towards the kitchen.

"Well, I'll accompany you then!" Raymond followed her. She stopped abruptly and turned to stare at him in utter bewilderment.

Raymond had forgotten that Mrs Pillsbury had no idea how much of a changed man he had become.

"How about you sit here?" Raymond made her sit at the breakfast table in the kitchen and made his way to the cupboards.

"Oh my gosh, have I done something wrong? What is it?" Mrs Pillsbury looked at Raymond with worried lines etched around her face.

"Oh god no, I just want to make something for you that's it." Raymond shrugged and tried to hide his remorse by how different he had been with Mrs Pillsbury for her to be this surprised by his gesture.

"Alright, what would you like to have?" Raymond rested his hands on the counter and leaned towards Mrs Pillsbury, who still looked at him as if he had lost his mind.

"Excuse me for asking junior master, but, are you drunk?" How Mrs Pillsbury managed to survive in this world with her sardonic mouth was a still great mystery.

"No, Mrs Pillsbury, I am perfectly sober. Have been for a while now. Now, will you please consider answering my question?" Raymond raised an eyebrow and reserved himself from laughing or crying in mortification. This poor lady was practically struggling under grasping his act of kindness. Raymond was trying very hard not to think much into it.

"Fine, I'll have an omelette then, if you ask. But I can make something for you. I mean, it's my job." Her eyes widened as she urged.

"I know it's your job, consider it a thank you for doing all that you have done for the household. Hell, everyone knows it's been a storm living here." Raymond sighed as he proceeded to take out the eggs.

"Are you sure you want an omelette? I can make something much better than that." Raymond said as he raised his eyes to Mrs Pillsbury who thankfully wasn't pale with fear now.

"No, thank you, junior master. But I must say you have changed a lot." She noted and Raymond wanted to roll his eyes at how many times he had already realised that by himself but he just smiled at Mrs Pillsbury and turned on to get some vegetables. Mrs Pillsbury wanted a simple thing such as an omelette but Raymond could make it in the fanciest way he could.

"Do we have mushrooms?" Raymond asked when he couldn't find any in the fridge.

"Oh yes, we do. I'll just get it from the back." Mrs Pillsbury stood up. Before she went any further, Raymond shook his head at her.

"I'll get it, you just sit here, okay?" Raymond said and when she frowned he realised she liked serving and helping people. Such a rare species. Wanting to do something good.

He scoffed at his thoughts and decided to just focus on food. Food made him calm. It was the best distraction and it felt amazing to feed someone else. A memory of Emily smiling and appreciating his cooking skills came to his mind. Nothing made him happier than seeing her happy.

Raymond smiled slightly but before his thoughts got dark he focused on the task at hand and plucked some mushroom from the garden he was very well familiar with. It was all his dad. He loved nature, in fact, his fondest memories with his dad were right here in this garden.

It's funny how this house was a mixture of happiness and misery at the same time.

Raymond took a deep breath and saw all the trees in the most healthy condition like ever. It was a work of art indeed. He found himself in awe of how wonders nature could do to a person by just existing. And we the foolish ones are just disregarding it altogether.

Raymond touched the leaves. He felt the cool fresh air scuffle his face. He basked his face in the bright sunlight. For a moment all felt serene. For a moment everything stopped and the stillness just lifted off all the weight. It was like being drunk with existence. Being intoxicated by life itself.

It was a really good feeling.

And Raymond was beginning to realise why he was here after all.

He just needed to simply exist for a bit.

Except.

He had no idea what he was talking about.

***

A/n: Was that all too poetic for ya? Cause that's exactly how I feel about nature when I am around it.

~Ria

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