Trepidation | H.S.

24 | Harry - Nightmare

To tell the truth
I just want my youth back
The life that was ripped from me

"You fucked up, Harry." My father's voice sent chills down my spine as the words came out of his mouth. "You know what that means.."

The knife slashed through my skin, layer by layer until the red crimson color began to flow out of me. The blood draining out of my body and another scar to be made. The first of many that I would get today.

"No, father!" I begged, my skin already burning with the pain he was putting on me. "Please don't do this I'm sorry."

"That's not an excuse." He spit out, rage seething through his teeth. "Now fucking listen before I purposely throw the knife straight into your heart."

I dragged my disheveled body, my school uniform stained red with blood already, finding that spot I had become so familiar with.

This is all my fault.

"What do you say Harry?" My fathers voice was loud through the ringing in my ears as the world shut out around me. "Say it."

I watched as he stood in front of me, the knife slick within his hand and ready to be thrown at me. It had become a growing fear, and I knew what it's consequences were.

"I'm sorry!" I screamed as the tears streamed down my face. The hot tears were seeping out of my eyes as I did anything in my favor to protect myself. "Please father, I'm so sorry!"

"Wrong." His voice deadpanned as a grin took over his face. "You know what that means.."

Before I could even react the knife was soaring at me like I was in slow motion. I couldn't move but I could see it coming right at me. It was going to hit me right in the spot..

"No!" I screamed and my eyes shot open as my body flung up from the bed. My heart was beating out of my chest and sweat was covering me. It felt so real, it felt like I was there like the little boy in my dreams, and the coward I still am today.

"Harry?" I heard her soft voice and looked over to her through the darkness and she was propped up staring at me. "Are you okay?"

Fuck. I did it again.

I let myself stay here with her, and here I am exposing my deepest cuts that haven't healed once again. I don't know why I always fucking stay with her, I've never stayed with anyone else in my life.

She just brings me so much comfort.

"What happened?" I heard the comfort in her voice as she flicked on the lamp on the bedside table and took my hands into hers. I know she could feel me shaking as my sweaty palms grasped into hers as my lungs begged for air. "Bubs? You can talk to me."

I instantly felt relief at the nickname, feeling like I could finally breathe some air. She didn't push me to talk, she just ran her hand up and down my back as her other hand interlaced with mine. She knew just the way to comfort me, like she had struggled with this before.