[COMPLETED]
trep·i·da·tion
a feeling of fear or agitation about something that may happen.
***
"You'll see the truth one day." I whispered against his harsh lips knowing this was wrong. The sensation was driving me insane, his warm breath panning...
You're a teaser, you turn 'em on Leave 'em burning and then you're gone
I recommend playing the song when marked for some extra fun ;)
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So I'm in a club... dancing to 'Come On Eileen'.
I regret making the decision to come here tonight. They said it would be fun to get out and party because after all, we are in the windy city.
They were wrong.
Moral of the story, never listen to other people.
I'm not having fun, at least I think that. I mean, maybe I am? I don't know, I don't hate it, it's just very different for me.
For me, it's not every day that I actually let myself go out and have fun. I really didn't want to come to some shitty club tonight, but Indiana somehow convinced me. She didn't just somehow convince me, she's just quite the tease.
It took a bit of bargaining, she told me I couldn't lock myself up anymore. And that I had been a total dick since the hotel incident and I needed to relax, but we don't talk about that.
That was a total disaster and a half if I must say so.
It's been a few days since then, I had to take a hot minute to let my raging thoughts cool down. They were pretty intrusive after it, and I had a pretty rough couple of days.
I don't think the fact I'm going through withdrawal is helping at all. I was stuck to the toilet the entire bus ride to Nashville the next day, it was awful.
My symptoms have been rough the past two weeks or so, but I don't know if it's the additional stress or what, because it was literal hell. Indiana didn't know I've been struggling with it the past few weeks, but I couldn't hide this from her.
We were still a bit rocky from whatever the fuck we were fighting over, but I'm glad we worked it out. I lost my control, and it was really bad but for a second I genuinely thought I might have lost her.
I knew I reacted wrong, it was impossible to stop myself. That was something new I felt, and I still don't really understand it. Just seeing her standing in there with a sheer look of panic on her face scared me.
She's a strong woman, and it's not that she couldn't fight for herself, it's the fear that I would have to lose someone I cared about. I hated that my reaction made her upset, I just wanted to show her how much I care about her.
Indiana is important to me, very. The thought of her being alone near my father and doing something as risky as she did made me panic. Literally, I locked myself in the bathroom and threw up until she pounded the door down.
I told her to leave me alone, but that wasn't a big enough warning. She had to bump into me a sweaty, mental mess. At least she was worried when she saw me lying on the ground next to the toilet. It was nice to know someone would be concerned if I was sick and dying.
