[COMPLETED]
trep·i·da·tion
a feeling of fear or agitation about something that may happen.
***
"You'll see the truth one day." I whispered against his harsh lips knowing this was wrong. The sensation was driving me insane, his warm breath panning...
Yeah, lately it's been hard They're sellin' me for parts And I don't wanna be modern art
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Stress doesn't even begin to cover what I feel right now. I can't seem to catch a goddamn break this week.
It's been four days since I felt happy for the last time. That night with Indiana under the stars, just us being free.
I felt something I never had before that night. I don't know what it is, but something just felt different. It was nice though, to have time and relax with just us.
Seeing Indiana so wild and free brought me peace. When I watched her run, the wind blowing through her hair in the night sky I wanted to admire that moment forever.
I hated that we haven't been able to see each other since then. I mean actually spend time alone and away from all the stress of this job.
We've been so busy with the end of the U.S. leg of tour coming to an end that it's just work, work, work. We still see each other everyday, but we don't get to just be us.
My father is pushing the five of us to our max right now, and it's fucking hell. Job after job, and it seems endless. I don't know why it's so hard lately, but it's about to send all of us off of a cliff.
With all the stress going on around us, I'm just trying to stay positive and think about what's coming. There's a little over two weeks until Thanksgiving which is good and bad. It means we will finish this part of the tour and finally get a short break, but it also means Black Streak Friday.
Black Streak Friday is a crazy fucking thing, and I know this year is only going to be worse. With the combination of my father going off his rocker recently, and whoever is after us currently, it's going to be a shitshow.
In addition to the pressure my father is putting on us for this all to go well, I'm still trying to work everything out. It's what I'm doing right now. In my free time on the bus which I should be using as time to sleep, I'm working.
I'm sitting on the couch in the back of the bus, my computer propped up on the arm rest. Indiana is passed out, and curled in a ball next to me. I just wanted to pound my head against the computer screen and let it knock me out forever.
"Fuck," I muttered under my breath as I tried to dig through old files I had. "Why can't I find shit!"
I spoke a little too loudly when I said my last words, hitting my hand down onto the couch hard. It made Indiana stir in her sleep slightly, but she was quick to fall back into the deep state she was in.
She looked so pretty in her sleep. Her lips were parted slightly, a soft snore coming out of her mouth with each breath. She looked so peaceful while she slept, but the crease between her eyebrows still showed she was stressed.
I hated that Indiana was still like this even when she was sleeping. That was supposed to be the time where she could just forget about everything. Nowadays, it feels like all I ever want to do is help her, be better for her.
