I'm Tired || Daisuga

- Harry Potter

I'm so sorry for the long wait I've put you guys through, school has been a lot and I don't like forcing my writing so I took my time to give you guys an extra long chapter! Enjoy!!

WARNING: contains triggering content, click away if you're easily upset by mentions of suicide.

Suga's POV

It was cold.

Too cold, and dry, and dark.

The numbness never seemed to subside as I yearned to feel anything at all. I remembered what I'd done, and I wondered if I was dead? But no, death was described as nothing but
cold, and even though most of my body shivered from its low temperature, my hand, the left one to be exact, burned a fire so bright, and so warm, I could feel it in my heart. Like a warm bowl of soup, or the first sip of hot chocolate, it was a familiar feeling.

Frustration built up inside me as I tried to move any part of my body, because it wouldn't respond. My eyelids wouldn't open, my toes wouldn't curl, but I felt my breathing, so the question was; where am I?

Suddenly that warm feeling started to pull away, seemingly leaving me. With every ounce of strength in my body I pushed to curl my fist, squeezing my fingers as tight as they could go. Somehow I managed a small movement, still confused as to what I was grasping onto. Then a soothing but panicked voice spoke to me, ever so warm and familiar.

"Suga, it's me Daichi. Can you hear me??" He said, worried but hopeful.

Oh my God, I'm alive, and Daichi is with me.

Only when my hand felt a strong squeeze did I realize he was holding it with his. I tried returning the squeeze in must have been successful when he laughed.

Slowly but surely, however, everything came back. My father, the nurses office, my bathroom. I remembered how I confessed to Daichi, how I downed half a bottle of aspirin right after doing so, and I remember the pain. My body started to shake as my breath quickened unevenly. I heard mumbling and someone yelled Daichi's name. It was painful to inhale but I was lacking oxygen.

"I'm here Suga, right here. Breathe, c'mon, you're gonna be okay. Everything is going to be fine, just breathe."he hushed and I immediately relaxed into his comfort.

I focused on breathing and trying to open my eyes. I wanted to talk to Daichi. Someone came into the room, but I kept my focus on my eyelids. Soon enough, they fluttered open and I was met with his deep brown irises, full of worry and excitement.

"Hi." Was all I could muster up, with a raspy whispered voice.

It took ten minutes for the doctor to run some tests on me, before Daichi and his mom could come back into the room. As they reentered, their faces were grim but I could tell they wanted to talk. I wasn't sure if I wanted to talk about what I did.

"Good afternoon, Suga," Daichi smiled, trying to sound natural and somewhat succeeding, other than the obvious eyebags and red rimmed tear ducts that told me he'd cried his eyes out.

I know it's not true, but a little voice in the back of my mind told me he was probably pitying me and still hated me, only crying out of guilt. It made my stomach churn and I wanted to vomit, but hadn't eaten anything to throw up.

He took my hand in his sheepishly and all my worries melted away, it was like my mind was cleared of all bad thoughts as I looked at him, my face heating up.

"I'm going to get the both of you some food." His mom said quickly before leaving.

We sat a little awkwardly in silence for a few more seconds before I couldn't take it anymore.