Spotlight |h.s|

Fifty

Harry Styles

This morning was the first one in weeks where Aubrey hasn't been next to me. I'm scared of how much of a routine we've managed to create. With all of the interviews and talk shows that have been taking up our lives recently, it was easier to just stay together since we had to ride to the events together anyways.

That's definitely the only reason why we did it.

I've spent my entire day with Zayn and Louis while she's done the same with Jade. It's been nice considering the fact that it's been a while. Sure, we see each other at work functions, but that's it.

Aubrey is also at those same functions, and recently she has been getting my full attention without meaning to.

Now, Zayn and Louis have been my focus for the entire day. It's winding down at this point, all of us sitting in their apartment quietly. All conversation has died down, us fully caught up on each other's lives with not much else to talk about.

"This is the first time in a while that you haven't declined when we asked you to hang out." Zayn states while looking at me.

"I've been busy." I shrug.

"You aren't the busy type. Is the coke thing getting worse? You're too quiet." He sounds a bit concerned about me, making me furrow my brows.

"No." I scoff.

"Don't lie to us, mate. It's not like you've had much more work than us. It's either drugs or a girl, and we both know it's not the latter." Louis pitches in, leaning forward a little in his recliner.

"It's neither of those things. It isn't anything. I'm just busier than usual." I lie.

"He's in denial. Probably coke." Louis looks at Zayn while speaking in a lower voice as a sort of joke.

"How could it be coke if I'm—" I stop myself before finishing my sentence.

They have no idea I'm clean. Aubrey and Niall do, but that's it. I kind of forgot since I haven't been around them like this in a bit. I slipped. Does this mean I have to tell them now? What am I supposed to say when they ask how or why?

"You're...?" Zayn searches my face for more.

I guess now is as good of a time as ever. I take a deep breath in preparation, trying to formulate some type of lie before I actually open my mouth to say it.

"I'm clean." I admit quietly.

"Did you just say what I think you said? Harry? Clean in the U.S.? I'm not buying it." Louis furrows his brows.

I nod, looking down at my feet as if it's something to be embarrassed about. I don't want them to make fun of me or anything stupid. It was hard enough to get here, and their insults wouldn't make it any easier for me. I don't think they'll technically insult me, but they'll definitely make jokes about it all and want to know more about why I stopped.

"For how long?" Zayn asks once his look of shock subsides slightly.

"A little over a month and a half." I shrug off, not wanting to make this into a big thing.

"No shit," he shakes his head in disbelief, "How did you even- Did you go to rehab or something without us knowing?"

"No rehab."