A/N Hey guys welcome to the 1st story I've posted on this site aaaaa
If anyone ends up reading this then vote comment whatever and ENJOY!!!!!
Btw in case u didn't guess italics are memories/ flashbacks
⚠️Tw for violence and abuse⚠️
_______________________________
Meredith P.O.V
My thoughts floated aimlessly; drifting around like lost children, clouding my head with endless dreams- impossible alternate realities. I willed my mind to focus, using the throbbing sting on my left cheek to anchor myself in the current moment. but to no avail. as it had on countless other occasions, my brain betrayed me, gently tugging me into the safe haven that existed only inside my head.
....Flashback.....
Nobody's P.O.V
Loud gargling snores filled Derek's trailer, so loud they might be mistaken for a train rumbling down the tracks. To many, the obnoxious sound may act as a deterrent- the inevitable lack of sleep posing a logical reason to steer clear. But not Derek. sleeping next to a chainsaw brought more comfort than he could've ever hoped or dreamed, every prolonged exhale warmed his heart like a lullaby and reminded the neurosurgeon how blessed he was to have her in his life.
The surgeon began trailing his fingers up Meredith's arm, causing a stir in her breathing. Derek faltered for a moment, believing he'd awoken her from her peaceful slumber, however soon his ears were once again greeted with the same loud gouts of noise as before.
Derek chuckled quietly to himself. It always amazed him how so much noise could come from such a small person. Just by looking at the woman in his arms, you'd never guess such ungodly sounds could be exuded from her. What with her large green eyes, petite lips- swollen from the previous night's activities, and her perfect button nose, it was almost unfathomable.
He pulled her deeper into his arms and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Though he made jokes, he knew his life wouldn't be the same without her in it. He often found himself in situations like this, just staring at her- admiring what he was so damn lucky to have. At these times he'd make little promises to himself, to spend evey waking day of his life worshipping every part of her; and to never allow her to feel unwanted or insecure.
He couldn't wait any longer to see her emerald eyes. He knew she'd be annoyed if he woke her up but at that moment he didnt care. Leaning down, the curly haired doctor pressed his lips against his slumbering girlfriend's.
Slowly, her eyes fluttered open. She stretched her arms and legs dramatically before recoilling and glaring at her boyfriend, huffing in annoyance.
"What" she demanded, only half joking
"You're beautiful" Derek whispered back, reaching up to stroke her hair
"Really?" Meredith hissed, grabbing his hand " 'you're beautiful' couldn't've waited another hour?"
Derek let out a loud belly laugh, throwing his head back and clutching his chest
"Oh you think thats funny do ya?" Meredith grabbed the pillow from behind her head and hit him across the face with it, catching the neurosurgeon offguard.
"I'll" *smack* "give you" *smack* "something" *smack* "to laugh" *smack* "about" *smack*
It only took Derek a moment to gather his senses and retaliate, mirroring her actions and returning fire with his own pillow.
A minute later and the two were in hysterics, collapsed in a pile on the bed, Clutching their sides.
Eventually, their breathing returned to normal, and the pair lay there, listening to eachother's gentle breathing before Derek spoke
"You know this isn't real right?" He asked, tilting her head towards his with his finger
"Yeah I know" Meredith sighed, wishing to any god out there that she could stay in this moment forever
"I'll always be here" Derek whispered, kissing her forehead gently and wiping away a tear
..."But not really"
I looked up into the mirror, fresh tears sprouting from my eyes as I surfaced from yet another aimless daydream.
I took in the sight of myself, something that was increasingly harder to do lately. My hair hung limply, any shine it had previously had vanished long ago; my now clammy skin was stretched so thinly over my bones I looked deathly. It's not like you'd be able to tell anyway, purple splotches were lined up and down my arms, my newest editions being five fingerprints, their dark purple imprint gripping tightly to my skin, a shadow of the action that caused them. My face was left mostly untouched, other than the fresh pink handprint on my left cheek I'd just received- the reason I was currently hiding. I just hoped it wouldn't bruise like the rest.
The bathroom door smashed open, frightening me out of my skin. Every bone in my body shook with terror, still reeling from the last blow it received. Like a lamb taking its first careful steps, I slowly trembled backwards, trying my hardest to steady my legs but failing drastically.
"What the fuck are you doing" He hissed, specks of saliva shooting like venom from his mouth. He advanced, stalking his prey like a vulture leaving me desperately trying to anticipate his next move.
"I asked you a QUESTION!" He roared, fist smashing down on the counter, denting it. I jumped backwards against the bathroom wall
"Quivering in the corner are we? Oh the wittle wittle girl is frightened? Fuck OFF with that bullshit"
His nose was pressed into my forehead now, the stench of cheap beer and garlic thick on his breath as he sneered at me
"Pull yourself together" He spat, looking me up and down in disgust and shoving me to the side
"Okay? That shitty 'deer in the headlights' bullshit isn't fooling anybody"
He stumbled out of the bathroom in a stupor, kicking the door closed behind him.
Bony arms ensnared grazed knees as I folded into myself, their cold embrace only serving as a reminder of how far away that no-longer-familiar warmth was- almost poetically so.
I crumpled internally, my eyes too tired to cry and my voice too worn to weep. I heard the last remaining flicker of my spirit fizzle out. Nobody was coming to save me. Hell, I couldn't even save myself.
More and more I was felt like a puppet, like a pawn in his sick game. I was sheet of paper and he was the author, writing out my fate in my own blood.
There's only so much blood I have left to give.
_______________________________
A/N OK PPL this is the 1st chapter if anyone acc reads this then comment and I'll put up the next chapter... I promise this is a MERDER STORY 10000% BYE MY LOVIES
.lexie.
YOU ARE READING
Tape and glue guy
Fanfiction* CURRENTLY BEING EDITED * ALL EDITED CHAPTERS START WITH A NUMBER _________________________________ In our lifetimes we are given many options. Stupid little choices We decide what schools we want to go to, what color shoes we're going to wear, or...
