Avengers broken

Ch. 25 "Habits"

                                                         Hayden POV 

I wake up to pounding on the door, my heavy eyelids slowly flutter open, I realize I'm still sitting along the door, my head resting on my knees, 

I must have cried myself to sleep, haven't done that since I was little, I thought I stand up popping some of the bones that were stiff

"Hayden you up?" I heard Steve's voice 

I opened the door slowly 

"I am now, what is it?" I said yawning 

He looked at me funny, 

"What?" I said annoyed 

"Have you been crying?" He asked 

"Pft, no I just didn't sleep very well that's all," I said 

"Well I was going to ask you to come with me on a run but you look tired," He said 

"It's fine, let me change," I said 

He nodded, 

I walked back in the room changing into leggings and a tee shirt, and my sneakers,

I walked out of the room, Seeing Steve still standing there, 

"Ready?" He asked 

I nodded, 

Let me just say I'm glad Steve asked running always seemed to clear my mind, even when I go to the dark corners of my mind, the parts that that spiral, like why? why does no one care, why did my parents even have me or keep me if they hated me so much, 

I think Steve was going easy since I'm at a even pace with him, I just felt depressed is the word after talking to my parents, 

They felt that they had to beat me to a pulp to test me, I thought 

Finally after our run I went to shower, I needed to think, keep the dark thoughts away, keep the anger at bay, normally when I need to take the edge off or just need to feel good, I go get some weed and I think I might do that, 

The talk with my parents left me feeling all kinds of angry, confused and most importantly hurt, 

After my shower I braided my hair to the side and got dressed I changed in leggings and a sweater, 

I walked out of the room, 

Making sure no one was looking I snuck out of the tower, 

"Piece of cake," I mumbled 

I walked a few blocks waiting until he showed up, I handed him the money he nodded giving me the weed, 

I walked down the street to the bridge, I sat indian style Taking a deep puff of the joint, feeling the edge roll off of me, 

I let the smoke come out of my lungs, 

"That's better.." I said feeling much better, 

After smoking the joint I hop off the bridge making my way back to the tower, 

I hit the button to the floor, and walk out to see everyone looking in my direction, Nat and Bucky stormed towards me, 

"Where were you?" Bucky asked 

You know I just couldn't hold it in, I just chuckled 

Everyone looked a little shocked and concerned, I started walking away, But Nat took my chin and looked at me, 

"What's with your eyes," She said sternly 

"Nothing that concerns you," I said walking away, 

That is until Tony is in front of me looking at my eyes, 

"Oh this is great." Tony said snickering 

"What?" Bucky said 

"She's totally stoned," He said 

"No I'm fine," I said waving my hand 

"That's it let's go now," Nat said grabbing my wrist 

"Once we find Clint we are talking about this," Nat said sounding angry