Avengers broken

Ch. 52 "Mistakes"

                                           Hayden POV 

It has been a few days since well you know, I told Clint to wait outside the room, because for god sake I need a shower, 

I smell like antiseptic, blood and sweat, and lets be honest that is just nasty, 

I am carful when I take my shower, making sure not to disturb the area, I let the warm water run down my body, I lean my forehead against the shower wall, 

My eyes closed, I have to say I do not enjoy getting shot, it's a lot worse than broken bones, being whipped, stabbed or any of the above that I've experienced, 

I used the coconut shampoo, 

I sighed feeling the grime get washed away, 

"Hayden you okay in there?" I hear Clint knock, 

"Yeah, I'm fine I'll be out in a few," I said 

"Alright, just let me know if you need help, I can get Nat if you need it," He said 

"I'm alright I promise," I said 

I'm always alright, I have to be, and yet, Clint seems to break past that tough exterior I try to keep up, I thought 

I washed my skin with the vanilla body wash,

I watched the suds run down my skin, into the drain, 

I turn the knobs to shut the water off,

I wrap the fluffy towel around my petite figure, I brushed my hair, getting all the tangles out from the past few days, 

I pull on some patines and Leggings, I pull my hair to the side and slowly turn around, looking at the scars that litter my back, some deep, some small, some large, this is why I can never forget where I come from, I can never out run my past, 

It will forever stick with me, I thought 

I put a dark bra on, and a oversized sweater on, I am finally allowed to walk around now, but Clint he's been very hovery But I guess I don't blame him, I mean I did almost die, I thought 

I have been thinking about what happened lately, and I don't understand why I did it, Why didn't I just shoot the guy with an arrow? Why did I jump in front of him, 

I just shook my head, 

I walked out of the bathroom to see Clint sitting on the bed with his arms crossed, he looked very deep in thought, 

He finally looked in my direction, 

"Oh good your done, how are you feeling?" He asked 

"I'm fine a little sore but I'm fine," I said blankly 

"Don't do that," He said 

"Do what?" I asked crossing my arms, 

"Acting like everything is fine, when we both know it's not," He said 

He stood up walking over to me, towering over me, he is quite tall compared to me, but hey I'm a tiny girl who can punch just as hard as Bucky, 

"I know that I'm just.." I trailed off, 

"What?" He asked 

"I don't understand why I didn't just shoot the guy but instead I jumped in-between him and the bullet," I said Shaking my head as we walked down the hallway, 

"Hey we all make mistakes Hayden, that's what makes us human," He said 

"Yeah, but normally I'm smarter than that," I thought 

"At least I used to be, I had to be," I said as I trailed off again, 

Why the hell am I telling him this? I thought 

Now all of a sudden I'm a freaking open book, get it tougher Hayden for god sake! I thought 

"You can't blame yourself for a mistake, you were trying to save him," Clint said putting his hand on my shoulder, 

I nodded, 

"Now come on I'm sure your hungry," He said smiling at me, 

"Yeah," I said trailing off again