Back and Forth

Chapter Eleven

   I walk upstairs hoping to talk to Stella. She hates me and I want to know why. All I've been is nice to her and tried to help her and Mikey out. I just hope she doesn't freak out on me again. I don't think I could take anyone yelling at me right now. I don't think I can take anything anymore honestly.

    "Hey, you up?" I knock on her door.

   "Yeah," she mumbles and I walk in. She is reading some book and puts it down when I come in.

   "What are you reading?" I gesture towards her book.

   "Just some book for school, Lord of the Flies," she holds it up and I nod.

   "Look I just wanted to apologize," I sit down beside her.

   "For what?" she asks. What am I apologizing for?

   "Um, I- I don't even know," I laugh at myself.

   "Do you apologize a lot?" she asks, a small smile playing at her lips.

   "Yeah, I guess I do," I smile back.

   "Why?" she asks.

   "I don't know," I shrug.

   "So did you just come in here to apologize for nothing?" her left eyebrow raises up.

   "Yeah, and to see how you were doing," I tell her.

   "Oh," she fiddles with her fingers.

   "So how are you doing?" I laugh.

   "Oh, right, I'm doing fine," she says curtly.

   "Why do hate me?" I ask bluntly.

   "I don't hate you, I just don't like the way you pity my family," she tells me.

   "I don't mean it to come off like that," I say, and look at the scars on her wrist. She sees me looking and covers them.

   "Look, I'm not some girl who needs anyone to feel bad for and buy things for out of pity," she snaps.

   "I don't feel bad for you," I tell her. "I feel bad about the situation you're in. I'm trying to help you, not pity you. I get that you're angry and everything, but you can't get annoyed everytime someone offers you something. Can't you just shut up and be grateful?"

   She doesn't say anything and just looks down. I shouldn't have said that, but it's the truth. I just need her to stop acting like I'm the bad guy and accept the help I'm trying to offer her. I don't want her to hate me, but I'd rather her hate me and let me help her than like me and deny everything I try to do.

   "I'm not sorry about this," I say. "We are going to go to the mall this afternoon, you're coming, you are going buy some clothes and whatever else you might want or need. You aren't going to complain and I want you to be happy."

   "Okay," she mutters and I smile proudly.

   "Good, be ready in fifteen minutes," I get up and go to tell Mikey that we are leaving soon.

   "Look!" Mikey points towards the thing he built with Safaa's legos.

   "That's awesome!" I pat his head. "You want to go get lunch and maybe buy some stuff?"

   "Yeah!" he stands up excited.

   "Did you bring that jacket I bought you? It's could outside."

   "I'll go get it!" he races up stairs and I smile at how adorable he is. Safaa and him would get along quite well. Maybe I'll call Tricia and ask if Safaa could come shopping with us, Waliyah too. I need to call Zayn first and ask if it's alright.