like a railroad

003

The party kicked up rather quickly, with influencers from all over the spectrum of entertainment entering the house. 'Streets' by Doja Cat was playing, and everyone was in their feels.

Unfortunately, I had already digested 4 shots and 3 dirty shirleys soo, I was past the fun drunk stage and progressing to the 'I am about to hurl' stage rather quick. I walked into the kitchen closing the door behind me.

I leaned over the sink, panting heavily before pouring the remaining few ounces of my drink into the drain, using the faucet to wash it down. I closed by eyes and let myself feel the beat of the song flood my ears through the crack underneath the door.

Opening my eyes, I found myself tossing out the empty red solo cup and walking out of the kitchen and over to Avani. "Hey girly, i'm going to the backyard to lay down ok?" I said letting her know where I was going. "Ok baby text me when you get outside, and if you decide to leave let me know ok?" She said, talking slow so that my overly intoxicated mind could understand. "Ok, I love you babe." I said patting her shoulder as I turned to walk away. "I love you El!" She said yelling as I walked outside the house.

As I exited the house into the backyard, I realized there was just as many people outside as inside, so I walked over to the table and climbed onto the roof.

As I walked the rim of the house I decided to walk to the top so that I wouldn't be told to get down by some random person at the party. Once I got to the top of the house, I laid down and looked up at the stars. The music was so loud, that I could still hear and feel the vibrations of the song 'Slow Down' by Chase Atlantic playing.

As I slowly closed my eyes, I heard a voice say, "Ella what the hell are you doing up here?" I rolled my eyes and sat up to see Vincent looking at me from 15 feet away. "I had a headache and didn't want to throw up on someone." I said dismissively, just wanting to be left alone. "Oh, do you need a ride home?" He offered, not taking my hint. "No." I said coldly.

"Well I'm just going to leave you alone, do you mind if I sit on the other side of the roof, I kinda wanted to get away from people as well." He said quietly.

I immediately hated myself for being so harsh. I mean did I despise him? Yes, but I also knew how it felt to feel alone while being surrounded by people.

"Yeah... of course, listen i'm sorry for being harsh, it's just, I don't know, I just forget that I'm not the only one with problems sometimes." I said looking into his eyes. "Oh, I don't really mind, I know how you are." He said with a smile.

He continued to walk over to the right side of the house's roof and laid down, with his hand behind his head.

The thing was, that no matter how much I said that I hated him because 'everybody was in love with him' or because 'he acted like he was the king of the world', that wasn't why I hated him at all. I hated him because he reminded me of my own sucky alter ego. He too was someone that had all the support in the world, but still felt alone. He too was good looking but hated the way he looked. I don't know, I guess we were just too similar.

Thats when it hit me, my mental health had slipped through my hands like sand, but I wouldn't let that happen with vinnie. I got up, and walked over to vinnie, sitting down in the spot next to him. His right hand was behind his head, but his left hand was laying at his side. I put my hand on top of his.

"Vinnie i'm sorry." I said in an apologetic tone. "For what?" He asked, turning his head to me. "For everything." I said. "But Ella, you didn't do anything to me. I should be the one saying sorry to you." He said, concern dripping from his words.

"No. No you shouldn't. We were best friends." I said "What happened?" He asked. "Honestly, I don't know. After my mom died that day in the accident, you just reminded me too much of her." I said.

"I'm going to take that as a compliment." He said. "I was quite literally in love with you vinnie, and then after that day, every time I saw you, all I saw was a missed chance." I explained.

"What missed chance El?" He asked me. "I got into an argument with my mom that day, my sister told me to apologize, because I could regret it one day... and, and I just, I didn't apologize." I said, tears starting to form in my eyes.

I sniffled and vinnie must have heard because suddenly, he rolled over, and used his thumb to wipe my tear off my face. "Im sorry for not reaching out El, i'm sorry for not finding you, and holding you close back when you needed me." He said giving me a soft, sad smile.

I let out an airy laugh and playfully pushed away his face. He laughed and we just sat on the roof, looking up at the stars together.

About an hour later, we got off the roof, and met up with Avani telling her that he was going to drive me home, she was going to stay the night with Anthony anyways, so it wasn't as if we were leaving her stranded.

As he started my car, he put on the song 'Shut Up and Drive' by Rihanna and I laughed. This was the song that was playing the first time we kissed. I thought back to the day it happened. The memory was still vivid in my mind. We were in the back of Avani's white Audi r8 convertible and the wind was blowing through everybody's hair, Avani was driving with Anthony in shotgun. It was sophomore year, 2 whole years ago, damn. Anyways back to the story this song started, as we went through a tunnel, like that scene in 'The Perks Of Being A Wallflower'. I stood up and let myself feel truly free, one with the wind. As we exited the tunnel, I sat back down and Vinnie cupped my face in his hands and I put my hands on top of his, letting him kiss me. Two worlds collided that day. It was a shame the new world went down in flames the next year.