Stockholm Syndrome

Eyes

Song: Need Some Sleep~ Eels

(A/N: You may have noticed I haven't stuck to a definite tense. (present/past) I'm trying to create a place/story that seems timeless, emphasising the craziness taking hold of the characters as it goes on. >:) )

Blackness. Warmth. Footsteps approaching. Breathing; loud and near. Heart beating faster. Pain. Glint of light on a blade. Lips pressing hard against mine; feels wrong and right. Breathing quickens. Someone calling my name urgently. Voice sounds so familiar. Someone's scream tearing through the darkness, tearing straight through me. SSUNDEE!

My head snaps up and I freeze, Derp's eyes millimetres away from mine. I scream in terror and he clamps his hand over my mouth. His eyes are different. An icy blue, almost electric. Wild. He's even closer now, his forehead resting on mine. "Shhh, I'm not going to hurt you." He lowers his hand and I choke back my fear. "Y-you hurt me b-before. A-are you here to do it again?" He blinks and I see his emotions changing rapidly behind his eyes. He narrows them. "Do you want me to hurt you?" "N-no, I was just wondering." He grips the chair on either side of me with his hands, leaning forward and bracing his weight against his forearms. My heart is pounding, his crooked eyes filling my vision. "There are more ways of hurting people than with a knife Ian." A shiver went up my spine as he whispers my name. "L-like what?" "Emotional torment is the worst. You can spend days tearing someone apart physically, but if you killed someone they loved right in front of them, they'd go mad from grief within hours." I shudder, seeing the harsh truth in his eyes as he spoke...like it had actually happened to him. "Y-you sound experienced in this field of torture." It was meant to be a weak attempt at sarcasm, but came out more like a statement. He smiles, showing his teeth. "Oh I am Ian. Too experienced." There was something about him, something that drew me to him. Whether it was the madness in his eyes, or the niggling suspicion he wasn't all he seemed, I just couldn't shake it off. "Another way is solitude. Leave someone in the dark for hours, even days, with the elusive promise of pain soon to come and they'll go mad from not knowing." His eyes went a shade darker, misery crawling up out of their depths. "And I should know." He whispers. I stare into his eyes and the scream from my dream tore through my mind again, it sounded like him now, sobbing and shrieking in the darkness. LET ME OUT! I shudder and his gaze fixes on me as he smiles evilly. "Scared are we? There's worse to come for you Ian. But you'll be free again one day...unlike me." I blink. "Don't you want to be free?" He nods. "I miss the sun...and the sky." He stares at me unblinkingly for a long minute, making my skin prickle uncomfortably. "Sky eyes." He whispers, resting one of his hands on the side of my face. I'm trembling more violently now, praying he left his knife far away from me before he came here. "You have eyes like the sky I have never seen." He whispers again. I inhale shakily through my nose. I can smell him now; a mixture of metal and fresh blood. It's intoxicating, I want to breathe it in again and again, like a drug. His wild crooked eyes never leave mine as his hand trails down to my neck, his fingers running over my skin. He remembers the kiss on it. I feel the area burn like it was a brand mark. Like he was marking me as his, and his alone. As I stare into his eyes, I realise I could be his. I was still being drawn to him. I want him to kiss me, want to feel what passion and lust lingers behind the mask of anger and betrayal he always wears. Suddenly, I realise all too late that he's actually leaning in. My heart pounds as I tried to pull away, but I had fallen into his eyes, a death trap. Then his lips were on mine and my insides recoiled in disgust. I was straight for gods sake! But then his hands are on me too, he kisses me harder and I feel the intense aggression and dominance behind it. There really was more to him, but this definitely hadn't been my intended way to find out. He pulls away as suddenly as he went for it, gazing at me. Then, his eyes sharpen in contrast when he sees the shock in my eyes. His expression becomes fearful and he jerks away from me, staggering back away and leaning against the wall beside the door. I run my tongue over my lips. I can still taste him; bitter and wild; it's as addictive as his scent. He's breathing quickly, his face hidden to me. "Rose warned me." He whispers. I wish I could at least wipe my mouth, but my arms and hands are still fastened behind my back, numb from being tied up for so long. He raises his head and stares at me in terror and regret. "I'm sorry." Then he makes a break for the door, shutting it behind him. Left alone in the dark again, I realise I've been holding my breath. I exhale deeply, dizzy from oxygen restraint. I realise something else too. Something I never thought would cross my mind, let alone be something I was now craving.

I want him to kiss me again.

***
Silence. I can hear every heartbeat. Every...scream. Every sigh. Every laugh. I turned my head slowly, staring into the darkness. I heard someone panting for breath. A dull thump of metal hitting flesh. I twirled the cold knife in my fingers, my breathing quickened and my heartbeat sped up. I heard footsteps. The sound of something metal being scraped against bone. I began to shake. The footsteps grew louder. Louder. LOUDER. LOUDER! My heartbeat reached a climax as my legs went numb. NO ESCAPE. Then, quieter, fading away. I was alone again. I ran my fingertips over my knife's blade, sighing as the heartless metal calmed my feverish mind once more. I couldn't think of Sky Eyes otherwise I'd want him again. I'd been trying to forget about it, but I just couldn't. The sound of his heartbeat pounding through me. His taste in my mouth, his scent infiltrating my senses. Intoxicating my mind; I wanted more, even now. I growled. I'd only just managed to restrain myself before. I knew what I wanted though; I couldn't have it. Couldn't have him; couldn't feel him or taste him. My body shakes as I snarl. No more thoughts. No more thinking. Remember what Rose said. IT. CAN'T. BE. Get used to it. I sheathed the knife and tangled my fingers in my hair, groaning and shutting my eyes tight. I CAN'T STOP THINKING. ABOUT HIM. You must, the nice voice replied softly. Sounded so familiar, it always did. Like a motherly voice...motherly...mother- Oh, GET over yourself, you PATHETIC waste of space. That was the hateful voice; he sounded like Master. Maybe he was. Leave him alone. That was hope's voice. He had given me hope when I was trapped in the darkness before. I grimaced, tears of pain and confusion stinging my eyes. "Please stop." I whispered. MAKE us, Hate mocked me. You know you'll always lose, you vexatious waste of air. You- "STOP IT!" I screamed. They fell silent. Sky eyes. Sky eyes. I was trembling, my hands itching to touch him, to hold him close to me and hear his heartbeat. I opened my eyes, tears falling from them. It was scary, like I had developed an...obsession with him. I should've listened to Rose, but I had to taste him again, and when I got that close...I lost control. Why am I like this? Like some sort of animal...not human... The tears fell faster. I heard them splash quietly on the grimy cement beneath my feet. You're an animal. A monster. And that's all you'll ever be. Hate was right. I am a monster.
***
I remember when I first met Derp SSundee. He was a young boy, around the age of 16. He had beautiful icy blue eyes, with flecks of ocean and lapis blue in the iris'. He had an infectious laugh and a sense of humour that could charm even the most blackened and petrified of hearts. But that all changed when he disappeared one day. I was younger than him, about 14, but I still heard the terrifying screams at night when I tried to sleep. I still saw and wondered about the blood splatters on the Professor's lab coat that seemed to increase in their amounts every time I saw him. I would ask him and he would just smile at me, a cold smile, as if he was laughing at my stupidity. "Ah Rosemary, you'll understand one day my love. It's all for science you see." "But what happened to him-?" "Who? The boy? Oh, he's fine." He would laugh, a hint of malice underlining his tone as he said, "He's never been better." It was many years before I saw him again. 6 to be exact. Now 20, a grown woman, I was called to Lab 5, a forbidden place to me up until that point. The Master had smiled at me. "Rosemary, I'd like you to meet someone." I had looked up and seen a stranger stumble out of the shadows in the darkened room, his eyes wide in fright when he saw me. He was shirtless and I could see vicious scars zig-zagging all over his skin, along with very angry red marks, and disturbingly recent looking slashes round his middle, like severe rope burns. I had stared into his wide, fearful eyes, and realised with a sense of abject shock and horror, that the very person trapped inside that mutilated body, staring back at me, was the same boy who had disappeared so many years ago. Endured agony after agony, his body being twisted and plied into something else, a killing machine made for one purpose. To kill and take someone's place. SSundee's place. Only something had gone wrong. Terribly, horrifically wrong. And if he ever found out what, he would never be the same again...