What I Miss About You

The Lioness - Ben

The grandfather clock in the hall chimed the hour...ten o'clock at night. It had grown cooler, a fire was lit, and the three of us were seated around its warmth. My phone was recording and Natalie sat across from me with her notebook, furiously scribbling and studiously avoiding my eyes. Between us, Dr. Heinrich sat, looking into the flames and reminiscing. 

"My parents, you understand, were quite proud of my swift promotion to captain in the ranks. If the war delayed medical school for me a few years, the honor of serving the Third Reich was worth it, in their eyes." Dr. Heinrich looked for me to Natalie. "You mustn't imagine my parents were evil people. They were proud Germans, very patriotic, and it seemed to them, as it did to many good Germans at that time, that what our leaders were doing was right. To be proud of being German again after the destruction and tumult of the last world war? One could not blame them. They, like many Germans were unaware of what was truly going on. It would be much later, even after the war before many German citizens realized what truly occurred."

I stared at him, deep in thought, my chin resting on my hand, brows drawn together. I tried to hang on his words but truly he was telling me nothing I didn't already know in theory. My eyes kept finding Natalie, but every time I looked at her she had her head bowed over her notes, also frowning in concentration as her hand flew across the paper.

Dr. Heinrich continued. "The event that began to...turn me...as you might say, was an encounter with a young nurse. A midwife, to be exact. She was quite young, but had learned the art from her mother who, along with her father, had been taken away to one of the camps." He paused and took a ragged breath. "One of my more unpleasant duties because of my medical training, was to oversee maternity wards in the hospitals. You see, the Fuhrer was very concerned with purity. Perfection. Anything less was unacceptable."

Dr. Heinrich speared us both with his gaze as we took in the meaning of his words. Natalie looked up at him slowly, her beautiful eyes widening slightly in shock. I had heard of these things before. My frown deepened as I continued to stare at the doctor, willing to continue this tale of horror. He lowered his eyes to the flames and the fireplace and for a moment seemed unwilling to continue.

"You're talking about birth defects," I said, breaking the silence.

Dr. Heinrich looked at neither of us as he slowly nodded his head. "They were rare. In fact I had never seen one at all until..."

This time it was Natalie who spoke up. She swallowed hard and leaned slightly forward. "Until?"

Oddly enough, Dr. Heinrich began to smile tenderly, as if he was remembering something that brought him much joy. "The midwife. I did not know it, because she was so young, so meek, and seemingly so biddable. I should have known when she never called me by my rank, but merely Heir." The folds in his face deepen as his smile widened. "She was no meek little lamb however. She was a... lioness."

Dr. Heinrich reached for the decanter at his elbow on the small table. He poured himself a measure of liquor before continuing his story. "One night I caught her leaving the hospital by the rear entrance. Must have been close to midnight. She had a small bundle in her arms. I stopped her and she immediately recognized me from my rounds." His lips twisted bitterly at the word. "It was not hard to discover what she was up to. It was a baby she was carrying, a baby who had been born missing his right hand. A genetic defect no doubt, otherwise perfectly healthy. But not healthy enough for the Third Reich."

Natalie was gripping the arm rests of her chair, pad and pen forgotten in her lap. "What did you do?" she asked in a choked whisper.

Dr. Heinrich's eyes grew misty and he continued to stare into the flames as if he were somewhere else very far away. "At first when I shone my torch in her face, she was terrified. Then she took in my uniform and, well, if looks could kill I should have been dead on the spot!" He smiled tenderly, eyes still seeing some far off, long ago scene. "She held the baby close to her, then turned away from me, staring at me fiercely over her shoulder..."