Imprisoned

Ch.9-The Villain-

-Sarah-

It's been weeks since we kissed and Loki still ignores it. It's so frustrating. I don't know why he would ignore it. Most of the time he stays silent and keeps to himself. I fill my boredom by binge watching shows, and I've started reading the other books on his shelf. He hasn't protested to me reading his books yet so I assume it's ok.

Later that night I get woken up by Loki, tossing and turning. Nightmares. I watch his face change to a worried expression. I debate waking him up, he doesn't want to talk to me. But I can't help myself. I want to help him, I don't want to see him in pain.

I shake his shoulders and jump back when he jerks awake and sits up in a panic. He breathes so heavily and I see a hint of terror in his eyes.

"Loki..." I say gently, placing my hand on his shoulder to comfort him. He immediately shrugs me off and gets out of the bed. It hurts me that he won't even let me comfort him anymore. I watch as he slowly walks to one of the walls, his back still facing me.

I've had enough of this. How can he shove me away when I am only trying to help?!

"Loki!" I yell, surprising the god of mischief. He turns to face me, a blank expression on his face.

"What?" He asks as if he has no Idea what he's been doing. I scoff.

"What do you mean, what?!" I snap back, "You have been ignoring me ever since we kissed, barely spoken 10 words to me for weeks!"

"I try to comfort you because you were having a nightmare and you shrug me off!" I fume. Loki looks away from me. I can't read his expression.

"You think I want to do this?!" Loki finally yells back. I look at him, taken back.

"You think I want to ignore you?! You think I don't want to talk to you every second of the day?! You think I don't want to hold onto you and never let go?!" I look at him, shocked. What did he just say?

"I don't get it then Loki! Why act like this if that's not how you feel?" I question. Loki looks down and sighs.

"Because I'm not good for you Sarah. I'm a liar, a thief, a killer. I'm the villain." He answers. I can sense the pain behind his words. Does he really think I see him like that? He has done some questionable things, very questionable things. But I can tell by the way he talks about himself, thinks about himself, that he regrets it. Maybe he is a villain. He feels so alone, lost, hopeless. Everyone pegs him as this pure evil, emotionless, killer, but these past weeks I've spent in this cell with him has proven that he isn't. Loki is misunderstood, I can see it in his eyes, he's had so much pain and rarely anyone to comfort him. He just longs for a happily ever after, like the rest of us. We've all made mistakes. Everyone deserves forgiveness, even Loki.

"Did it ever occur to you that I don't care?" I state, getting out of the bed and walking over to him. He looks up at me confused and still frustrated.

"How could you not care?! I'm evil do you not get that?! I could only cause you pain Sarah." I see his eyes get glossed over. I can feel myself hold back tears. How could he think so little of himself? If only he saw what I see in him, a sweet, caring, sentimental, misunderstood, god of mischief. I grab his hand. He finally looks at my face.

"Loki. You are not a villain, or evil. You have to understand that I see the better side of you. Obviously you are not the best person in the world, but I know there is more to you. Not everyone can live with so much pain and still come out the other end." I say. It's the truth. I know he hasn't told me much about him, but he doesn't have to. I can see it in his eyes, the way he walks, how he hides his true self behind his rough exterior. He isn't cold and heartless.

Loki's face softens and I almost see a smile. His hand reaches to hold my head. I look up at him, searching his eyes. His hand is so gentle as he examines my face. After a few seconds he sighs.

"Sarah..." His almost smile turns into a frown, "...you don't know the real me." I look at him with sadness and confusion.

"What do you mean the real you?" I question. Loki exhales, releasing his hand from my face, frustrated. He avoids my gaze as his fingers fiddle with the small knife at his side.

"Loki...please. You can tell me anything." I say, stepping closer to him. He still doesn't look at me so I grab his arm, stopping his hand from playing with the small knife. He finally looks up at me, jaw clenched.

"No Sarah! I can't tell you this! I can't tell anyone this!" He yells and walks abruptly past me, pulling his arm out of my grasp.

I grab his arm and he stops walking.

"You know what Loki?! I thought you trusted me more than this! I thought you thought more of me!" I snap, "It hurts me that you think after all this time together that I would judge you. I'm trying to be here for you! I'm trying to help you Loki! But you push me away, and it hurts!" I finally say everything on my mind. I feel a sense of relief getting that off my chest. Loki still doesn't look at me, but I know he is thinking something.

"Fine!" Loki yells back at me. 

He finally turns to face me and I feel his arm grow colder. I look up at him, seeing a pattern of blue appear on his face and body. His eyes morph from emerald green to a bright red. Loki's entire body is an icy blue and his arm gets so cold that I let go. I take a step back in shock at what he has turned into. 

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