Read my heart, not my mind

12. Missing (my) Hufflepuff

I sighed irritatingly as my foot continued to bounce under the library table and my mind refused to stay still for even a moment. I was attempting to conquer my History of Magic essay before I had to head to the Astronomy tower for my Thursday evening lesson. I pulled my wand from behind my ear and tapped the tip against the parchment, thinking hard. The subject of the essay, to wrap up our study of wand-lore, was to explain the different traits of our wands and how they related to us as individuals.

I jumped back a little, dropping my wand in fright, when the tip produced an angry little fountain of colorful sparks. I could feel the heat build in my cheeks as I cautiously looked around the library. I couldn't help the sigh of relief that washed over me when I realized that it was still dinner and none of the other tables held any students. I snatched my wand back into my hand and stared at it, frustrated with myself and everything else.

I had barely seen Hoseok today, hadn't spoken a word to him since he helped me sneak back to the Ravenclaw common room after escaping our pursuers last night. I watched him dash away after D.A.D.A. without so much as looking back. I waited for the entire hour after lunch in the cold little room that I thought of as ours and he never showed. I didn't have the heart to face the Great Hall at dinner in my current mood so I slunk off to the library instead.

I stared back at the title of my essay and tried to pry my concentration off of Hoseok and all the things I must have done wrong. Did he guess that Amortentia smells like him to me? Was that too weird? Obviously me liking someone had to be a death sentence for their social life, but I really didn't think Hoseok was that type of person. I sighed, annoyed that not only did I fail to focus my attention on my studies but now I was one of those pathetic girls that tore themselves down because a boy didn't like them back.

I snorted and felt a smile pull across my face, I guess I never really liked a boy this much before and I had no right to call them pathetic. I set my wand back down and laced my fingers through my hair so I could hold my head up and just stare at the empty parchment. Part of me wasn't worried in the least about finishing this essay before it was due the following week. The subject matter was some of the most interesting I think I've ever studied, and it wasn't like my wand was going to change overnight.

But mostly my brain was stuck on a boy. I sighed again as I pulled my fingers out of my hair and quickly undid the French braid. It was something to distract me as well as combat the fact that now I looked like I'd been pulled my hair at the roots. Instead of something intricate or pretty, I just piled my hair onto of my head and secured the curly locks into a tight ponytail that hung well passed my shoulders. I rarely wore my hair up because it was too irritating and pulled against my scalp enough to make it hurt, but at least now I felt more businesslike and ready to do my work.

I could push Hoseok out of my mind. I was smart and independent and completely in control of myself. I liked finishing my homework so I could read my book and I was determined to do so.

I sighed again nearly ten minutes later when my parchment was still empty and my head still full. Stupid boys. Didn't he say that my time was his? Could I have misinterpreted the meaning behind those words? I groaned and shook my head, lost in a problem that had no solution, a living nightmare for any Ravenclaw worth her blue and bronze colors.

"Miss Price," Madam Pince said from the edge of my table, her voice high and annoyed, "if you continue to sigh like your life is going to come to an end, I will remove you from my library. I am attempting to relax and I cannot concentrate with you like this."

"That makes two of us." I said under my breath before turning toward her with a slight smile. "I'm sorry ma'am, I was just getting ready to leave." She harrumphed but moved back to her desk as I began to pack everything away. I still had nearly an hour before Astronomy would start and since it appeared I wasn't going to finish this essay anyway, I might as well bring my other things back to my room and get my star chart.