I am Leal

A secret shared is a trust formed!

"So tell me. What is that between you and Cody?" Euphoria asked me curiously. We were currently on our way to the canteen to get our breakfast. Naz and Kara were already there. They didn't wanna wait on us. Not really us more that they didn't wanted to wait on Euphoria so I made the sacrifice to wait on her. I am a nice sister I know.

"He is my commander!" I answer her question. "Yeah, I know that but you like him don't ya?" She digs deeper. "Yeah, he is a great commander!" I try to dodge the subject. I didn't wanna talk about it. After what had happened yesterday and Bric's statements I had refused to think about the boys and especially Cody as less as possible.

"Oh come on, Lele! I'm your sister you can tell me if you like him." She wraps her arm around my shoulder and I  look into her blue eyes. "There is nothing there!" I say and concentrate back on the white hallway before us. I tried to not think about him. About the way he made me feel. About the evening in the training room as we were alone. About the way his eyes seemed to pierce through mine. About the things he said when I had slept. About his hands. About his smile. His beautiful scent that lingered around him.

I exhale and stop my thoughts before they can get too far. I knew that deep down in my heart. He meant something to me. More to me than I ever wanted him to be. But I didn't know to what extent.

Suddenly Euphoria stops. I look confused back at her. "Leal, you can talk to me. What Bric said..." She says softly and looks to the ground. "He lies!" I defend myself. "I know he does. You are not that person he tried to portray yesterday. You worked so hard for this without really knowing about it." She raises her hands to ease my tension. I sigh but don't say a word.

She looks back up after I didn't say anything.

"Leal?" Euphoria asks softly. I look up to meet her gaze. " You don't need to be strong all the time. I hope you know that." "I am not..." I start to defend myself but get immediately interrupted by her.

"You protected us our entire lives. And you did a pretty good job by doing so. You were always our tower of strength. You were perfect at it actually." She stops and looks me in the eyes.

"I just want you to know that you can talk to us. You can talk to me!" She finally says. "I know and I appreciate that. Don't think I wouldn't but I really don't want to talk about Bric's stupid words or Cody right now." I sigh. She pulls me in a hug and we hold each other for a little bit.

"I love you. I hope you know that." She whispers into my ear. "And when you're ready I will be here!" She continues. I smell her lovely scent. "I love you, too." I say and breath out. "You know, you're my favorite sister. But don't tell Naz and Kara!" She whispers and lets go of me.

"I won't!" I promise her.

"And just so you know, you are wrong with something. I am far from perfect." I say and she grins. "Who are we kidding, Leal? You are the epitome of perfection. You just need to do something for the first time and you're perfect at it." She says but gets serious again. But before I can interject she continues to speak.

"Seriously, sometimes I ask myself how you can be this selfless? Hell, you broke down and didn't wake up for seven weeks. It was in this time that I realized what you did for us. You laid your life down before us and we tramped right over you. And still you didn't say a word and accepted it. But not only then but with Bric too."

She looked to the ground. But she continued to talk and I listened.

"He beat you nearly to your death and you stood up. He beat you to your knees but you had just your eyes on us. You still reassured us that it's gonna be okay. That you are fine. And you stood up when you would fall. You would continue to talk to us. I don't know how you took all of the beating and still took care of us. I sometimes dream of these moments and see you beaten down but still willing to survive. I can't get rid of the memories!" I could hear her sniff and quickly pull her in a hug.