Butterflies (A Harry Styles Love Story) [COMPLETED]

Chapter 35 - Still the Charmer

Jennifer's POV

Anne, Robin and I sat in a comfortable silence, waiting for Harry's therapy session to finish. None of us really had anything to say, it was obvious that Harry was at the forefront of everyone's minds. I heard the sound of muffled, raised voiced behind the door. The sound-proofing of the room unfortunately making the voices indistinguishable, I just really wanted to know what was going on in there. Not because I was nosey but because I wanted to help, I wanted to know what was going on inside Harry's head. 

Suddenly the door was flung open, a frustrated Harry storming out, his hair was out of his face, indicating that he had pushed it back, something I know he usually does when he's frustrated, angry or doesn't know what to say. His eyes were a dark green, not the vibrant bright green I had so often stared at. Just as my mind could instruct my feet to move and chase after him but before it could to get my mouth to form the words to shout his name, Dr. Flemming pulled me back, stopping me from chasing after my obviously distraught boyfriend.

"What happened?!" Anne asked, worry evident in her quiet voice. Robin put his arm around Anne's waist, the very same action Harry had done on me many times before. 

"He became quite frustrated, normally patient's files are kept confidential but on this occasion I think it's best I tell you some of the issues Harry is battling in his mind," he explained. I swallowed, Anne's hand rested on my shoulder, squeezing it slightly, she could clearly sense my upset and concern.

"But Harry..." I tried, staring off in the direction he ran in.

"I'll go and find him," Robin offered, ruffling my hair and pressing a kiss to Anne's cheek, "you two go with Dr. Flemming and have a chat,"

"Thank you," I murmured quietly as Robin shrugged on his coat and headed off in the direction Harry went.

Dr. Flemming's office was simple, nothing over the top. I gingerly took a seat on the couch, Anne by my side as r. Flemming took a seat behind his desk.

"Harry seems to be having internal battles," he began, "none of the patients I talk to are the same, but Harry seems completely different. I have never spoken to someone with this amount of self hatred and paranoia. I'll do my best to help in every way possible, it's my job after all, but what he really needs to you," his gaze focused upon me. I swallowed, unsure if he was looking at me purposefully.

"Me?" I questioned, pointing at myself. Dr. Flemming nodded slowly and sighed.

"He said that sometimes you make the pain go away, when he's with you he's okay. I know it's a lot to ask, but please don't do anything that would possibly push him into the darkness,"

"The darkness?" Anne asked, her voice was far quieter than usual, it was clear that she wanted to cry so I laced my fingers with hers, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Yes, it isn't uncommon for my patients to refer to "darkness" or "emptiness", Harry calls it darkness, he said he was totally in the dark that day he tried to commit, he said he couldn't see a thing" I closed my eyes, refusing to let my emotions get the better of me.

"I don't think I can stop that," I said, sighing, my free hand pushed my hair from my face.

I'd love to know what else Dr. Flemming would've told us about Harry's first therapy meeting, but as Robin entered the room, his face white as a sheet, struggling to find the words to tell us anything, I knew harry needed me.

I sat by the bed, my hand running through Harry's messy curls, his hair was damp at the front, some of his hair sticking to his sweaty forehead. His eyes stared straight into mine yet his face remained emotionless.

I don't know how long we sat like that, Anne and Robin were sat the other side of the bed, Anne tried on many occasions to hold her son's hand but Harry would jerk his hand away. All the while, his eyes never left mine.

Minutes turned to hours, the room was enveloped in darkness as Robin sighed and muttered something to Anne before they both stood up. Robin helped Anne into her coat, both of them wishing Harry love and get well wishes, Anne leaning to kiss Harry's forehead. He let her do it which relieved me and then they left. As soon as the door closed and my eyes returned to Harry's I noticed a change in them. The glossiness, the tears building up in his tear ducts.

"It's okay" I murmured, the first tear rolling down his cheek. I wiped it with my index finger, leaving my palm pressed against Harry's cheek. He was in need of a shave, I knew he hated letting his stubble grow, especially to the point where it would tickle my hand, as it was now.

"Help me get better, I don't want to go to therapy again," Harry said in the quietest, most vulnerable voice I have ever heard. I breathed deeply.

"I'll never stop helping you H, but you also need to help yourself,"

"I will,"

His words were sealed with a soft kiss to the back on my hand and I smiled.

"Still the charmer?" I commented.

"Always," he smirked. That smirk.

"Sleep now Haz, tomorrow we really need to talk if you really want to get better,"

His eyelids closed, his breathing slowed until it was at a slow, leisurely rate. I sighed as I wrapped my coat around me as some kind of blanket. I shut my eyes, allowing myself to fall into a peaceful sleep, forgetting about tomorrow and whatever it bought with it. For now all I cared about was the fact that Harry wanted to get better. That was enough for me.