Butterflies (A Harry Styles Love Story) [COMPLETED]

Chapter 46 - Harry's Lyrics

Niall's POV

To those of you reading who have never had to with-hold a secret from your best friend, I hope you never have to do so. To those of you that have, at least you can somewhat fathom the guilt and the paranoia the burden of such a secret carried with it.

Sure, I've kept many secrets through my lifetime, like that time I swore to never tell Louis' mum about that party he had while she was on holiday or when I promised to not tell Liam that his dad was trying to buy him tickets to see Wolverhampton play a home game. But none of them carried the weight and the effort that keeping this particular issue a secret did.

Jenny and I would meet up every so often, over coffee, a meal or the cinema, one time we even went bowling. I watched as her life panned out, her and Patrick becoming stronger than ever imaginable. She told me every little detail about just what was going on in her life and, likewise, I told her mine. I was thrilled when she waltzed into Starbucks, with a shining, silver ring endorsed on her ring-finger, almost as thrilled as she was when I first introduced her to Scarlett. Jenny was over the moon, instantly hitting it off with Scarlett as they gossiped about fashion and makeup, making me, rather awkwardly, sit on the edge of the table, slowly sipping my coffee.

I got to know Jenny inside out, better than I'd ever known her even when she was living in Chester. It pleased me that Patrick was unphased by our friendship, not at all suspicious or jealous, simply pleased that Jenny was happy and carefree.

It's when you know someone as well as I know Jenny that you can spot a mood shift, or an emotion a mile off. And, as she walked in whilst I sat in the back corner of a small Starbucks off a side street in London, flipping my silver and white wedding invite between my fingers, I knew something was wrong. It had been a few months since we had last met and I had noticed a dip in contact between us these past few months. She wouldn't send me random, funny texts most days any more and, when I asked, she barely wanted to talk about her own life, always preferring to talk about mine.

Her stomach was the first thing I noticed, it petruded slightly, making her tight top ride up a little above the waistband of her jeans also, as she clutched her handbag over her shoulder with her left hand, I noticed the absence of her engagement ring.

I quickly shoved the wedding invitation back into my jacket pocket as she approached. Standing up, I opened my arms and she instantly fell into them. She breathed deeply against my chest as I held her tightly. Something was wrong, something was very wrong.

I won't explain word for word the ins and outs of the next three hours of conversation that me and Jenny held, most of it was Jenny sobbing into a tissue anyhow which to anyone other than myself, would make no sense anyway.

But, as Jenny blew her nose one final time, rubbing it slightly with a tissue before scrunching the small white sheet up in her hands and tossing it into her empty coffee cup she spoke the words that changed everything.

"He broke up with me, because I told him I was pregnant."

In life, you don't get to practice your reaction to such a statement very often, if at all really and my face certainly seemed to have difficulty pulling an appropriate face to distract from the fact that my brain had crashed and no words were coming out of my mouth.

And that's how I found myself in Jenny's small, rented apartment, chucking darts at a framed picture of Patrick across the room. We had already broken all the plates and the duck feathers from the cushions covered the room.

"I hate him," Jenny yelled, chucking another dart across the room, smirking slightly as it hit the picture of Patrick right in the chiseled as fuck jaw.

"Same," I piped up, mainly for moral support. My phone beeped, Jenny remained oblivious as she ran out of darts and opted for chucking hair grips and cutlery at the picture instead.

1 New Message From: Scar <3

Hey babe! Was wondering where you'd got to? Just got in from work and you weren't here, I hope you and Jenny had a nice time today!xxx

New Message To: Scar <3

I know it's a long drive but fancy driving to Jenny's? Got into a bit of a situation and I think a chinese and a bottle of wine would go down a treat right now. Will explain all when I see you. Love you xxx

1 New Message From Scar <3

On my way!xxx

Relief washed over me, in just a couple of hours Scarlett would be here to take Jenny's mind off the situation at hand as much as she could.

"Jenny, c'mon, let's go to your room and chuck out all his stuff, do something productive rather than just messing up your apartment?" I suggested, approaching Jenny slowly from behind so as not to be taken out by a flying spoon. Jenny huffed, dropped the remaining forks and spoons onto the floor before leading the way to her bedroom. I had never been in here before, I'd hardly ever entered the apartment but it was exactly how I'd pictured her room to look. There were framed photos along the windowsill, a giant canvass of the New York skyline mounted on the wall and, other than that, the room was stark white with black detailing. In the past four years Jenny had become very sophisticated and concise, a habit she had got off Patrick, everything had to always be 'just-so', nothing out of place. She still adopted her carefree personality, even if slightly dummed down, and the tips of her hair were now the only place a bright colour would ever be sported, the rest, back to a light brown colour.

"Where shall we start?" Jenny asked, looking to me for guidance, of which I had none.

"Anywhere,"

"Last box!" Jenny cheered, dragging a cardboard box out from beneath the bed. It was tattered and worn, shit, was written across it in red marker.

"What's in this one?" I asked, flipping the lid open and taking out a tatty old teddy.

"Mr. Snuggles!" Jenny exclaimed, snatching the teddy from me and clutching it to her chest like a small child. She refused to let the bear go so I began taking items out the box, "it's all stuff Patrick said couldn't be on show around the house because it was old or silly or whatnot," Jenny sighed as she watched me unpack. Most of it was rubbish, but sentimental nonetheless.

As I got to the bottom of the box, the doorbell rang.

"That'll be Scarlett," I said, about to stand up.

"No, you stay," Jenny insisted, "I'll let her in," I obliged and made myself comfortable once again, picking up some sheets of paper from the bottom of the box as Jenny left the room.

The sheets of paper were all print outs, copies of emails and, as I flicked through, the subjects of them seemed somewhat familiar.

Don't Let Me Go

Spaces

Gotta be You

Night Changes

Still The One

As I paid them more attention I realised they were songs and not just any old print outs of lyrics. Harry's lyrics.

But, as I heard Jenny and Scarlett joke around in the kitchen I realised that right now, Jenny couldn't know this so, just as I had kept our friendship a secret for Jenny's sake, I decided to keep the origin of these songs a secret for Harry's sake.

This secret however, would prove a lot more painful to keep than any I'd ever vowed to keep before.