The other half of Josh

chapter 13- You can trust me with your life

Do you ever meet someone, and you think "you." And you don't know why you think that, or whether it means anything; but you think it all the same. You think 'you' or 'him' or 'her' or 'them' or their name, and you don't stop thinking their name for a long time.

You can't stop thinking of their face, their eyes, their body, their personality, you cant stop thinking about them.

Every time you see them its like its started all over again, you can't look at them without smiling. Its not love, but it could be, heck, you don't even think you like them. But you could.

You might even force yourself to stop thinking of them, but then you look into there eyes, and you just think 'you.'

And you still don't know why.

They don't have special qualities necessary, or a different look, they might not even be original. But yet you catch yourself daydreaming about them, worrying whether you look nice enough to talk to them, worrying if they will talk to you.

Its an odd feeling, right? And not always a good one.

Josh has been this person for about a month now, and I hate it. I hate how he's done this to me. I barely know him and yet I can't stop thinking 'what if?'.

He's a dick, a complete dick. I hate his eyes, i hate his lips, i hate the way he smiles, the way he talks, walks, breathes.

But this hate isn't the same type of hate I have towards Ella morris, or Royden, no, this hate is something else. Its embedded in the swirling thoughts of how goddamn hot he is. And how perfect his eyes are, how perfect his lips are, how perfect his smile is, how he talks, walks, breathes.

He's so perfect in the most frustrating way. Fin knows it, Ethan knows it, I even think Josh knows it. They all know how mesmerized I am by him. And I hate it.

I'm out, in town, with Vicky and Harry, but I wish I wasn't. I love them, but after the Incident with Harry and Josh, we haven't talked properly. And Vicky, she's just being Vicky. She couldn't get these shoes she wanted earlier and Now she's a little stroppy. And plus, I think they know about my little josh situation too.

"Shall we go get a coffee?" I suggest, hoping they say yes.

"April, your the only one who actually likes coffee." Vicky replies.

Damn.

"I'll buy you both ginger bread men!" I announce, they laugh but start to quick march to Costa all the same.

However much everyone goes on about Starbucks, I am forever faithful to Costa.

Just before we reach the coffee shop, Harry stops hard. He stares off into the distance, seemingly searching for something.

"Josh Clark." He says with a hard stare towards the local ramps. I look over, and there, as harry said, stands Josh. Looking directly back at us.

I mentally make note to never subject my children to the horrors of living in a small town where you can bump into anyone, anywhere, anytime.

Josh turns and walks away, I pounce on Harry. "Okay," I say, "that's it, what is it between you two?"

"I'd rather not say." He replies.

"This isn't an option, you either tell me, or I'll ask josh" I say.

Harry sighs, he seems annoyed, "look, this isn't anything you need to be involved in, just back off okay?"

My eyes widen "okay." I say feebly.

We stroll awkwardly into Costa, where I order a latte.

We sit in complete silence, leaving me a lot of time to speculate about this situation. Harry and Josh, the two least likely people to ever cross paths. And yet it seems their paths have been mangled together by god knows what.

I get up, make my excuses and leave the shop, leaving Vicky to ramble about the latest trends and harry to listen.

I turn left out of the shop, which is the way home, but loop around towards the skate park. I need answers, and apparently Josh is my last option, he's the only one who might give them to me.

I scan the skatepark and see no sign of him, there's not really a hiding place for him, and he clearly isn't on the ramps themselves.

I turn to leave, disappointed, when I hear a sharp whistle above me. My head darts up, and in a concealed tree next to the old bowls green (now overgrown and useless) sits josh.

He's perched on a high branch, but looks fairly safe. He looks comfy, kind of cute in a way. He wears a tight knit jumper and black skinney jeans, along with converse shoes. His hair is fashioned in its usual style, volumized up and a little bit bed head. Yet totally flawless.

"Well, you coming up or not?" He shouts. I hesitate, its not like I've never climbed a tree before, but its been a few years. "Come on, April!" He yells.

Is it bad that I like it when he says my name?

I glance up the tree, looking for the best root to take. As I climb, my heartbeat slowly accelerates, while my breathing becomes slightly heavey. Whether this is because I'm getting higher, or because I'm getting closer to Josh, its hard to tell.

My foot slips a couple of times but in the end I reach the branch he's perched on. It didn't look this small from down below, but now I'm here I see it can barely fit him on, let alone the both of us.

He pats a small spot next to him, and I carefully wriggle in between him and the tree trunk. Our bodies are pressed close together, and he has his arm basically around me as he needs to hold onto the trunk to prevent him from falling.

"Hey." He says, slightly breathless too.

"Hello, Josh" my reply is met but silence. "I was wondering..." I start.

"About me and Harry?" Josh finishes.

"Erm, yeah... I guess"

He sighs, as if he wasn't expecting the question, ironic since he guessed what I was going to say. "Look, April, I know you are desperate to know, and I do trust you but,"

"So just tell me! Its not like I'm going to tell anyone else, I have a right to know!" I cut in.

"But you don't. You don't have a right. Its something between me and Harry, and I honestly do want to tell you, but, one, I barely know you and two, its Harry's choice too. I can't tell you a secret that isn't fully mine." He lectures.

"Get to know me then. This is my best friend we are talking about, and he won't tell me a thing, he's never going to tell me. Josh, please, I need to know." I reply.

"Okay, I'll make you a promise..." He pauses, "I promise you that I will make the effort to get to know you, if, you make the effort to get to know me. That means no excuses when we ask the other to hang out, whether that's hanging out with friends or not. No excuses. That means friendship. We will be friends now. And then, if you can trust me with your life, and I can trust you with mine, only then, will I tell you."

It takes a while to sink in, I run what he said through my head twice, before even contemplating an answer. He's asking me for my friendship, he's asking me for my trust. For me, its alot to ask for.

"Okay..." I reply "okay. But you have to stick to this, you can't bail out. Once I've earned your trust, you will tell me right?"

"Yes. I will, I promise." He holds out his pinky finger.

"Seriously?" I laugh.

"Seriously." He replies.

I hesitate before entwining my pinky with his.

***********

Wow, that's chapter 13! After a super long period of time where there was no update, I apologize for that! I'm really sorry. I really hope my updates will be more frequent from now.

Who ships Japril??? [Jay-prill]

Love,

Ellie

Xxx