Alignment of the Stars

Chapter 21

I look at Conan's face with suspicion, I raised my brows as I escape from his gazes. He held for my hands and pulled me towards him.

"I'm sorry, sorry if I didn't know. If I could have known what you have been suffering I could have protected you from the grief and misery that have been haunting you for a long time. I'm sorry if I was blinded." He said as he clasped his hands around me.

The sun was already setting down to take a rest as darkness starts to surrounds us. I pushed him as I can feel how warm his breath is. His tears were negating its affection. I looked at him and saw how he was also wrecked with what happened but I'm still confused. I can't allow this confusion of mine to create decisions that will certainly make me regret on the verge.

"How? How can you still love me?" I asked the same question that I threw to Neil.

He held for my hands and put them in his chest.

"Because my heart tells me." He said as his stares were completely drowning me in his affection.

I was completely shocked by what he said. His answer was solely different from Neil's.

"No! You don't understand," I said as I removed my hands from his grasp

He looked down as he felt the same pain before. Nothing will ever change, the same scenario will lead to the same pain and grief.

"Then let me understand." He whispered.

He slowly raised his head and looks at me.

"Let me understand!" He said.

I've already told him countless times but he keeps on coming back.

"I'm pregnant!" I shouted as my tears were unhurriedly plummeting.

"Then I'll take it as my own! I can be the father of your child if you just let me! I don't fucking care about the past, I want you! I want to live with you. I want to love you! So please, let me!" He deciphered with his voice.

This man just can't give up. I've turned him down several times but he keeps on persuading me! Is this even right? Is being with him right?

"Hey look, you don't have to worry about anything, stop living the shadows of your past. Live your own. I know it's hard but you'll never be free if you won't move on." He said as he glanced at the sky.

I looked up above and saw how the stars were giving us light, watching us.

"But it's hard!" I mumbled.

"That's why I'm here. I'll help you if you would just let me fill the void!" He rebuked.

I can't imagine myself being with him again. I don't want to spawn the pain that I've been feeling to him. It's too selfish.

"Loving you has a lot of consequences but I don't mind them facing with you. As long as I have you by my side, we can turn the tables and make things the way it's supposed to be." He said.

I am amazed at Conan's confidence.  Never have I thought that he has the guts to speak such words.

"How's Vicente by the way?" I said while trying to change the mood but I just forgot that his father was the culprit of the nightmare that we are living right now.

He looks at me and stared vividly. I think I played the wrong buttons.

"How can you still mentioned his name knowing that he is behind all of this?" He said while releasing an extensive sigh.

I just chuckled and return my gape at the sky.

"He's doing fine..... He's doing fine in prison. May he'll rot in hell! I have never told you about him before because of his behavior and personality. I don't even see what my mother saw in him. Whenever that man comes home, he is always drunk and would always force my mother to feed his lust. I despise him, he let me do all the work while he benefits the money out from it. He only uses it for his girls, alcoholic beverages, and even drugs. He deserves in hell. But as much as I want to let him die, I cant. My mother loves Vicente too much, if it means Vicente dying so does my mother. My mother is willing to go against all odds just for him. She is desperate for love. I've asked her once why is she so desperate, but she said to me when you're in love, pain is inevitable but so does happiness. That's why I'm here, trying to fight for you." He said as he glanced at me.

Now I know what secrets he has been hiding. It was selfish of me before to ask him these questions. I left unuttered.

"I'm sorry to hear that." I smiled.

Vicente is already in prison, my Dad is making sure that he won't go out from the bars that are blocking him from his freedom. But knowing my Dad, he will never stay silent until he gets what he craves. And that is Vicente's life.

He ruined mine and now Dad's gonna ruined his.

But the feeling of guilt haunts me, upon hearing Conan's side makes me having doubt.

Throughout my life, I have been selfish and now, I want to stop that insanity. I can't let Conan's father die, for he is the backbone of his family. Killing him means killing his family. But I can't do anything, Dad has all the power and he can do whatever he wants. But I'll try. This time I'll fight.

"We have faced a lot of problems Conan, problems that provoke pain and suffering from our relationship but as long as we keep on fighting we can surpass this. As long as I have you, I'll try to forget the past and live my present with you." I said as I hugged him.

We sat on the bench as we let the wind played our hair and how the sky was watching us. He wraps his arm around me. I lean on his shoulders as he caressed my hair. I missed this. Nights with him make me forget all the problems that I am facing. For once, I feel like the stars were with me.

And then I kissed him without any uncertainty.