Alignment of the Stars

Chapter 28

A year has passed and a new chapter was unveiled but the darkness you've brought was slowly demolishing me, slowly killing me. Whispers in the sky, wishing you to come back. Seeing you at your brightest makes me drown in the depth of darkness. I want to be with you, the glimmering hope you give and the sparks of affection was what I needed. But now you're gone. You're with her. You're with your moon.

I remember that day, you once told me that I'll be yours, for you I'm the brightest, I'm your star. I believed in what you've told me. We were happy, spending quality time with you makes my heart fleeting. You make me feel special, you make me become the best version of myself. But you've changed

You started to decline my calls (especially when I needed you the most). You ignored me, your attention was certainly drizzling into someone else. I need you, I want you, I love you. After several months of ignoring me, I was shocked when you texted me to meet at the same place.

The place where you confessed your love, the place where we started to wish in the stars. The place where we belong. But I've never thought that it is also the place that would end us, our relationship.

From that text, I already know what will happen, but I still wore the dress that you bought me. It was dark then only the moon and the stars witnessed the tragedy that I might encounter. I was waiting for you, waiting for you to end it. Then you came, you smiled at me and memories starts to grind the tears. I smiled back.

We were sitting under the stars. We were looking at the sky seeing the majestic art of the world.

" You remember that day when I held your hands and asked you to become my girlfriend? It was the best thing that ever happened to me" he said

I know where this is going, and I just nod, enduring the pain.

"The stars were shining at that time, they're shining for you. But among the stars, you were the brightest"

I looked at him, stared at him. Feeling sympathy, he started to hug me. He whispered at me and said

" You're the brightest love"

He was crying and I wiped his tears,

" How big the moon is, full, light, and beautiful. Just like her? "

He was shocked,

" I know you have someone else, you love someone else but it doesn't change my love for you. But I want you to be happy. I want you to grasp the desires that you have. "

He was just looking at me crying

"I'm sorry," he said

It breaks me seeing the man I love asking forgiveness because he can't love me back. But that is life, we can't force someone to stay and love us.

" Don't be, just promise me you'll be happy okay?"

That night, the sky witnessed everything. Starting from our beginnings and endings. I want to fight for him, but I just can't. Maybe it's because I'm tired of being his star when he already has his moon. How ironic it is to compare my life to the stars and the moon, maybe it's because they were there when we started and ended our relationship.

Cosmo, I want you to be happy.

Let's now follow our different stars, I love you.

I left him there so do the memories that we have made. Maybe this is what I have been waiting for, the closure. I was just waiting for the right time to clear my mind and accept reality.

I'm happy for him even if it's against my will, I'll set him free. For it is the only way to let also myself free from the burden. 

Seeing him at his brightest gives rise to his future. He can no longer have pain, trauma, and anxiety for he has left that in me. Maybe time will come and I can accept it. Just let time heal all the wounds. I'll try to live a happy life for my baby, my baby Cosmo. The universe of my life.

I've named my son by Conan's name, to remember the moments that have built me and the love that changed me.

For now, I am slowly reassuring myself to be contented with what I have.

Life is full of plot twists and he was the best twist that ever happened to me. He had restored and fix me. And I hope he can still do that, not with me but with his fiancee. I hope he's happy now. I can't wait for that time to happen, to make me see that being with him was the right choice that I've take.

I'll be forever grateful for without him I wouldn't have seen my worth and how wonderful the world is. He has let me see the light. He has prolonged my life and he has given me hope. He was the only man that has ever given me so much love, acceptance and I can never imagine living a day without him by my side. But I must be strong. For me, for Him, and my baby.

Thank you for letting me feel that I can be loved. A person who is as broken as me can still have a place in this world. No words can measure my love and no stars can compare to the light that you have given unto me. I'll always be grateful for our relationship. I love you, Conan. And may you reach your dreams in life. I can't wait to see you being happy with your own family by that then I can feel the same way. Keep on shining my love for you have the power to conquer the darkness and surpass any circumstances.

There are a lot of things that I have learned from him but the most highlighted claim is that he lets me realize how love can heal the wounds inside.

But instead of healing them, he causes me more pain. And now, I'm all alone. Just like a star.