My Spiritual Awakening Diary

Social Media Cons

Let me start off by acknowledging that there are pros to using social media such as gaining accessibility to more information and people. We can now maintain or form relationships across the globe, because of it. Social media can be a great marketing strategy for businesses. Artists can also promote their work on social platforms to reach and connect with a broader audience, which helps advance their careers. They can have more engaging conversations with supporters and receive feedback as well. People in general can now share their experiences, opinions, feelings, creativity, news, and information with others in a relatable, insightful, or entertaining way. 

However, the cons of using social media are starting to outweigh the pros to me. It's so interesting how the very thing that many used to temporarily escape their unpleasant reality before, has become something people tend to need breaks from now. Social media apps like this one are very addictive and using them can be time consuming. Hence the name "tick-tock." Oftentimes we mindlessly scroll on these apps for long periods, waiting for our next dopamine hit. Even content creators experience the "casino effect" with obsessively tracking their analytics and posting in hopes of their videos going viral. We get used to absorbing so much energy and information into our subconscious within minutes that we either become easily overstimulated, desensitized, or our attention span starts to shorten which plays a role in creating this microwave society. We live in a time where many topics are creating more division and animosity among the collective. There are so many miserable people who use these platforms to argue and project negativity or insecurities through mean comments or draining posts. Although you may not have anything to do with it, you're still absorbing that harmful energy by seeing it, which can remain trapped within you throughout the day or night depending on if you scroll on these apps right after waking up or before bed. Exposure from the phone's blue light can also negatively affect your sleeping patterns. Stumbling across triggering content for a few seconds earlier in the day can still affect your mood for the rest of it. Your mental health and self-esteem can also be negatively affected from social comparison. Although many people may still use social media to temporarily escape their problems, the intention oftentimes backfires because instead of distracting you, these apps end up serving as a constant triggering reminder of the things you lack and the pain/inner conflicts you've suppressed. It worsens your depression, body dysmorphia, and other insecurities. While mindlessly scrolling, you're subconsciously comparing your looks, relationships, accomplishments, possessions, and/or lifestyle in general to others. I'm here to reassure you that you are NOT a failure or falling behind in life. You ARE enough and you're right where you need to be at this given time. Whenever you start to feel insecure, it is important to remind yourself that social media is a facade or at least only half of the truth. People only show you what they want you to see, which are usually highlights and not the challenges or trauma faced behind closed doors. Unlike in person interactions, we have more control of our image online. This advantage has caused many to post things that create an idealized version of themselves, appearing very attractive in any or every way. We want others to think that we are physically attractive, intelligent, wise, cool, funny, entertaining, wealthy, strong, well-liked, fashionable, and/or simply flawless. However, this "perfect image" lacks authenticity and instead increases superficiality/vanity online, which prevents us from truly connecting with others. Although social media can help us rapidly gain validation from followers, what good is any of that if it's not sincere or only surface level connections? Not to mention the loneliness epidemic among the youth. There are people with many followers, but not as many friends in real life. Many people now have poor social skills and experience anxiety during in person interactions.

 Social media created a lot of unrealistic expectations when it pertains to beauty, relationships, and success. Although beauty standards can be different across the world, women usually with "European" facial features, lighter and clear skin, straighter hair or ones with a looser curl pattern, a curvy yet fit body (hourglass figure), and a "perfect" bright smile, are favored by people, especially men who deem them the most attractive on social media. We obviously know this is due to things like colorism, featurism, and texturism. However, this is also due to existing in a patriarchal and capitalist society that profits from self-hatred. Corporations purposely create insecurities and unrealistic beauty standards that they know most women don't but will desperately try to meet to appeal to the male gaze. They'll then profit from advertising false or temporary solutions with beauty products and cosmetic procedures. For example, in 1915, men wanted to make more money, so they told women that having body hair was masculine and unhygienic, then sold razors to them. Although women didn't care about body hair before, once that insecurity was conditioned, they now felt compelled to remove it regularly, which kept them as a returning customer. The same thing happens with cosmetic surgeries. Women will get on these apps and stumble across pages, photos, or videos of other popular desirable women and see all the attention they get. They'll start to monitor and inflict evil eye onto that other person, wishing it was them receiving that male validation instead. They eventually find out that the social influencer has gotten work done and proceed to as well. Then they go to these plastic surgeons who don't really care about their patients' overall health and just want money. They'll show the surgeon a perfectly angled, filtered, and edited photo of a "sexy" woman they've stumbled upon online and say, "I want to look like that!" They'll go through with the procedure, disregarding the potential side effects/risks and acquire the body parts of their dreams. However, unfortunately it doesn't stop there. The body dysmorphia only worsens. Once they are able to fix one thing, they'll always find something else to be dissatisfied with. The plastic surgeon wins over a new returning patient/client. Later down the line, those same people who were initially bragging about their new appearance and shaming those who remain natural are the same ones who come crying back to the Internet about the health scare and issues that developed from those procedures whether it involved veneers, implants, fillers, butt/lips injections, BBLs, etc. They then regretted them and wished they were patient enough to naturally gain results through things like exercising or wearing braces. It's actually really sad how people don't love and embrace their imperfect, unique beauty. We're programmed to believe that we must change the unique parts of ourselves to please others by meeting those beauty standards. In the end, we seem to just be striving for one type of beauty nowadays, which is boring. We aren't meant to all look the same. We naturally come in all shades, shapes, and sizes. 

How success is portrayed on social media is also very unrealistic. (Check out my Strong Dislike for Capitalism Journal Entry if you haven't already.) The fact that people are expected to have everything figured out at a certain age is ridiculous considering we'll never fully have anything figured out. Honestly, a lot of us are just pretending to have everything together. We all seem to be playing the role that we think we should be, which explains why we're so mentally & emotionally exhausted all the time from masking. We're expected to own a popular business, trendy clothing brands & accessories, an expensive car, nice house, and be married with kids by a certain age to be perceived as successful. It seems like a very superficial and unrealistic perspective. Especially during a time like this with the bad economy. To me, someone who is unapologetically themselves and truly content with their life is successful. Someone who no longer people please, knows how to set boundaries with others, loves themselves enough to release the things that no longer serve them, and surrenders to life's constant changes are successful. Those who may have experienced a lot of hardships and trauma, but still have the strength to continue living while being a good person are successful. The people who flaunt all day on social media are lonely, miserable, and aren't living in their truth. Many go broke in the process of trying to appear rich. They secretly feel like they have nothing else to offer besides materialistic things. Remind yourself that everyone is on their own unique journey and timeline. "Life is a marathon, not a race." 

As for relationships, NEVER consider any couples you see online or even in person, goals. "We live in a sad generation with happy pictures." Anyone can keep up a facade for a few minutes to record. The main ones smiling in front of a camera are usually the ones going through HELL behind closed doors. Some of them could be experiencing domestic and emotional abuse. Some of their partners don't even really like them or are cheating on them and even having babies outside of the relationship or possibly bringing them back STDs. Same goes for "friendships." Although you may see someone with a large group of friends hanging out, partying, and traveling together all the time, I guarantee you most aren't their actual friends, more like acquaintances or enemies that are secretly envious and competing with them. Easier said than done, but try to limit your screen time, don't believe everything you see online, and stop with the social comparison. Protect your mental health. There is a reason why the people who've created these social media apps barely use it or don't even allow their kids to.