Dissection || yandere x reader

Chapter 15

I woke up with a not-so-surprising weight on me. I could feel the mattress next to me dipping slightly as I heard low soft breaths. I blushed more of out shame than embarrassment. I felt conflicted in the warm covers. Should I turn around? Wake him up? Scooty away from him and pout like a child on the floor? I felt like the last one would make the most sense even with how stupid it sounded at that moment but the cold floor wasn't as inviting as the warm covers and the body also made for a good argument. I tried to silence the thoughts inside me to run to move away to push him away. I knew it was stupid, everything around me right now was and it felt like I was the biggest stupid thing in the room. I wanted to imagine pretty actors or artists. Maybe a first crush or any conventionally attractive person next to me instead of him but I couldn't. His light snoring was so unmistakably his, his warm delicate smell so unmistakably his, I could practically taste his shampoo on my tongue because of how close he was. And his face, so distinctly carved into my mind that I could never forget it. As ironic as it was he was at that moment the most comforting and familiar thing in all of this. The single thing that still tied me to the outside made me so sickly aware of how close it was. I exhaled loudly letting that be the only sign of my frustration. The breath tickled the hair that fell on his eyes and nose. His nose wrinkled and I smirked at my small triumph which was sadly short-lived. I heard a deep inhale and saw his eyes slowly open. I closed my eyes and slowed down my breathing. I felt like to child pretending to be asleep to not have to wake up early with the small hope that my parents would just leave me be it never happened though. I kept my breathing steady and tried to focus on something else. My imagination proved to be ineffective once more so I tried my other senses. My nose was filled with his smell and I could feel his body right next to mine. I wanted to focus on the sound it could've been so easy in a place like this. Birds flapping their wings, branches moving and hitting the walls, and someone moving around in the house to make breakfast. Instead, my ears were met with an eerie stillness. The inky thing I could hear was some pipe or air system somewhere. I wasn't certain of either. Focused on my breathing trying my best to not let my breath hitch as he stroked my cheek so lightly that it could've been a feather. I feel him shifting on the mattress next to me as he leaned toward my face. I loved my head slightly to the side trying to persuade him not to commit even more of a crime than what he had already done and he might have listened because he froze and stayed still and then moved out of the bed. I listened to the sounds he made. Shuffling on the floor, 24 steps up the stairs, a door being open creaking slightly as it was pulled back into place but a click that I expected never happened. I stopped myself from opening my eyes and inspecting the odd occurrence. Then I heard him getting up the ladder but the thuds of the foot against metal were so soft that I could barely hear them. After counting in my head to around 100. I wasn't sure I felt restless and didn't feel like paying attention to the numbers anymore. I got up and quietly tiptoed up the stairs. I held the hold the side of the door ready to fling it open, to get up that same ladder and....and what? Run? Where? How? What direction? I wasn't certain I even knew. And it didn't sense I mean he was up there somewhere stomping around doing God knows what. I smiled at my stupid little thought in this stupid little staircase. I couldn't do this right now. I couldn'trebek against him, fight him or even talk back really none of it made sense in this situation. This was a completely different game. Not between a cat and a mouse but between well I wasn't ready to find out what he was in all this or what I was. I just knew what I didn't want to become. His little plaything, a toy he could pick up and throw around whenever he wanted. I gripped the door tighter and flung it open. I placed both my hands on the ladder and started climbing. Each movement of my arm made me more determined. I reached the end and smiled at the half-darkness. I knocked on the trapdoor, waiting for him to let me out of there.
As the light hit my eyes I made sure that my smile remained natural but welcoming so as not to alarm him and to save myself if he got too happy seeing me like that. Clay smiled down at me and took my arm yanking me up and closing the door.

- Good morning sleeping beauty

- Did I sleep that long? When did you wake up?

- Half an hour ago- he said with an even wider smile

Liar I thought but why was he lying right now? It was just sleep so what was the reason?

-You should've woken me up too then- I swallowed-we could've eaten breakfast together.

I saw his eyes flutter and change. His gaze was so warm and sweet that I felt sick again at the mere thought that I knew what I was doing to him. My patience started to grow thin so I spoke up again.

- So what do you have planned for today?

He frowned an expression that suited him much more right now.

-Starting school soon. I should probably go get changed and well..shower because as much as I hate to say it I have a life besides you but don worry I'll make sure you'll become an inseparable part of my every day soon as quickly as I can.

I simply pursed my lips together and smiled again not even trying too hard to fake anything in particular. I just knew that if I beamed and grinned at him he would do things that I was not comfortable dealing with. His affections were the last thing I needed but if I said something I know I'day something I'd regret and he'd regret hearing it more.
He smiled back at me and ushered me to the table where there was a plate and some utensils. I sat down and waited for him to dish for me. Some eggs, cherry tomatoes, and mushrooms. Not the worst thing for sure. He then looked at the clock on the wall and frowned the second time. My satisfaction grew.

-What's wrong?- I asked trying to seem as concerned as I could.

-Gotta run! But I'll see you later today!

He started putting some things in the dishwasher and at the same time trying to put some things into his bag.
He practically started running towards the don't open it letting the sun in.

- When are you gonna be back?

He spun around just as quickly as he had just wanted to run out.

- I promise soon. School always passed quickly but seriously have to go. Bye!

Soon. I didn't like that word every time he said it. The door shut and I heard a disappointing click of the lock. I didn't even have to stand up to inspect the door this time. I knew I was locked in pity that I couldn't be what he forgot in his hurry. The eggs weren't seasoned on the other hand. I stood up and looked for salt and pepper on the counter. I then looked up at the wall where the clock hung ticking away every second of this miserable situation. I put the salt back down and put one foot on the counter hoisting myself up and snatched the clock. The big oval-shaped clock kept twitching with each tick. "Soon" I thought again as I walked back to a window. 'Soon" I thought as I put the wooden shutters up. "Soon" I thought as I pulled at the handles.