Chapter 15: Jealously

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A week later

Kelly

So I've been doing great with my recovery form the surgery and I haven't had any kind of complications with the healing. Tim and Solange have been a great help with Faith. Before anyone ask no I haven't talked to my ex yet. I don't really want to. She saved me and now she thinks I owe her something. No it doesn't work like that. I'm grateful that she was here and that she took me to the hospital but I just can't right now. My heart is still hurting. I'm trying to move on with my life and she keeps stumbling back into it. I need space.

That's why I've working a lot more and putting a lot more hours in. Now that Faith is a month old. I'd like to actually have a life again. I thought I was doing that before but now I can just focus on me. I don't wanna sound selfish but I've never been able to be selfish. So now is my time to just do me.

Speaking of doing me. Beyoncé is here. She's doing her weekly visits now. She use to come by everyday but after the whole hospital thing she's been kind of keeping her distance. About time.

She rings the doorbell and I set Faith in her swing in the living room before answering it.

"Hey" I say opening the door.

"Hi" she walks right past me and goes straight to the living room. I follow her.

She picks up Faith out from her swing. "Hey Baby girl"

"She's been trying to figure out how to hold her head up lately" I laughed. She's literally like a rag doll.

"Are you trying to be a big girl?" Beyoncé asked and Faith giggled in response. I smiled at them.

"How are you holding up?" She asked me.

"I'm still a little sore but I'll be fine"

"That's good Kelly"

That's when Faith started crying. "Oh what's the matter Huh?" She asked as she sat down on the couch. I hesitantly sat down next to her.

"She might be hungry" Beyoncé said.

"Did you want to feed her?"

"Uh sure"

"I'll go warm a bottle up" I said as I went to stand up. I go into the kitchen and finally give myself time to exhale. Have I been over doing it? Okay maybe a little but I have things to do so if my uterus could hurry up and heal that would be great. I can't let Beyoncé know. She'll worry and I'm not ready to talk as friends yet. I don't even know what we are at this point.

I still don't even know how long I'm gonna keep this going. How long am I gonna pretend that I don't want her back and that I'm done. Like Tim said I deserve better. I know I do but I can't help but wanna just drop all this and run back to her. What does that say about me? That I can let her do whatever and I'll keep crawling back like a lost puppy. No way.

I stood and waited for the bottle to be warm up. I was so lost in thought I didn't even notice Beyonce come up to me.

"Kelly you okay?"

"When are you gonna stop asking that?"

"Sorry"

I grabbed the bottle from the warmer and wiped the water off of the sides. "Here" I handed it to her.

"Thanks" she said and turned and walked back into the living room. As I walked towards the door. I heard someone knock.

I'm not expecting anyone. I opened the door. It was Tim.

"Tim! Hi!"

"Hey. Sorry if this is kind of a bad time but I was around and I thought you'd like to accompany me to lunch"

"Uhh yeah it's kind of a bad time. Umm but I'm free for dinner tonight"

"Okay sounds good. I'll pick you up at 6"

"Okay" I said and he smiled at me and turned to walk back to his car.

I shut the door and walked back into the living room.

Beyoncé was giving me a look. "What?"

"Your going on a date with Tim?"

"Uh no it's not a date"

"Then what is it?"

"Nothing! Why do you even care?"

" Never mind! Forget I even said anything"

"No Beyoncé just say it!"

"He doesn't care about you. He just knows I'm out of the picture!"

I instantly went on defense mode. "You don't know that! Actually you don't know anything about him"

"I know your just doing this to get back at me!"

"This isn't about you!" I yelled. She didn't know him. She knew nothing about Tim.

"Then what's it about Kelly?"

"None of your business!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

Beyoncé

After Faith was done with her bottle I handed her to Kelly. "I'll be back next week. Have fun on your date"

"I will" she fake smiled.

I rolled my eyes and slammed the door on my way out. I can't believe her. Crawling back to Tim like that. Tim is literally an opportunist. He only wants her because I'm not with her. I fucked up and now I'll probably never get to see Faith again once he's back in the picture. She's doing this to punish me. He wants her so I can't have her anymore.

I just want my family back and I don't think I ever will. Should I just move on and give up? I don't even know anymore.

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