The Wife

Chapter 18: Moving Forward

A couple days later.

Beyoncé

Today Kelly and I have a counseling appointment to work on our relationship. I only agreed because it's what Kelly thinks we need to do. She's not wrong. For us to be able to move forward we need to do this and as of right now I'm letting Kelly run the show because it's really up to her.

I met her at the house and we had decided that we would ride together. She hops in my car and buckles her seat.

"You ready?" I asked as she shut the passenger side door.

"Yea" she replied not looking at me.

"Kelly?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay?"

"Why are you always asking me that?" She asked sounding annoyed.

I pulled out of the driveway. "I'm just worried about you"

"Well I'm okay" she insisted. "It's just been a rough morning"

"Why? Did something happen?"

"You mean besides Faith screaming her lungs out for no reason"

"What was wrong with her?"

"That's the thing nothing, I fed her. She was changed. Nothing could've been wrong. I didn't know what to do so I put her in her crib and left her there. I was about to loose my mind"

"Maybe she's getting sick or something" I suggested.

"I don't know Bey" she shrugged.  We made small talk as we made our way to counseling office.

I eventually pulled into the parking lot and we got out an walked in without saying anything to each other.

Kelly went up the desk and checked us in and came to sit by me in the lobby sitting area.

After about a couple minutes of waiting we we're called back

We both took a seat on the couch and the therapist sat in the chair across from us.

"So Talk to me, what seems to be the issue here, I got the Cliff notes version from Kelly when she called but I need you to tell me in your own words"

I took a deep breath but before I got a chance to answer Kelly answered for me.

"She slept with her ex fiancée"

I looked at the floor. "Oh? So infidelity, has this happened before or is the first time?"

"I mean does Nicki even technically count bey?"

I shrugged. I didn't exactly know how to answer that.

"So more two times now? Kelly how are you handling the most recent affair"

I looked over at Kelly. "Uhh honestly I'm not doing great. I've been trying to use work as a distraction without over doing. I'm just trying to hold on"

The therapist nods. "That's totally understandable and valid. It's a lot of process and when your handling something like that it's hard to take control of the situation so we just react right?"

Was this whole thing gonna just be about me being shitty person and Kelly getting all the sympathy. What about me?

"I just didn't think you'd ever do that to me. I couldn't believe it. You were supposed to love me Bey and you hurt me"

"I do love you Kelly"

"Do you? Because it seems like every time things get serious between us you decide to screw everything up by doing stupid shit!"

"You were so excited about getting a new house and having more kids. I don't think I'm ready for that yet"

"You slept with your ex and hid it from me for weeks because you can't handle that I want to spend the rest of my life with you!?" Kelly asked angrily.

"I was going to tell you sooner but I just didn't wanna hurt you"

"So you just decided to let it marinate for a couple of weeks and then thought tell me while we were on a date was a good option?"

"I didn't want to lie about it anymore. I couldn't do it"

"You wanted to tell me so I knew or you wanted to me so you could have a clear conscience?"

"A little bit of both. I didn't want you finding out on your own, I thought it was be easier to just tell you myself"

"Why him?" She asked.

"What?"

"Why Shawn"

"Look it didn't start off with us having sex I went over there to talk and clear my head. At the time we were friends. And then one thing led to the other and you know the rest"

"Did you think about me?" She asked.

"Yes Kelly"

"Really?"

"Yes I swear"

"Okay I'm sorry to interrupt but here's what I think you two should do, there's clearly a lot you two need to work on starting with your communication. I think staying separate for a little while longer is a good idea. I can see you both care about each other but there's still a lot of hurt there. I also think it would be best for you to focus on finding each other again. Make a list both of you And write down what you like and don't like about each other. Figure out what works and what doesn't work and go from there"

We both glanced at each other. We both knew she was right.

"Thank you" Kelly said. We said our goodbyes and made our way to the car.

Kelly leaned her head back on the head rest.

"Bey?"

"Yeah?" I said as started the car up.

"Do you think we could really do this?"

"Yes, I do. Do you?"

"I don't know. Is that bad that I don't know? I don't wanna lead you on but I really just don't know what think anymore"

"No Kelly I understand what you mean"

"I'm hungry" she said. I laughed.   

"I'll buy you some lunch"