Light As A Feather..Diego Hargreeves

9

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YOU MUST BE HORNY AS HELL

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present !

⸺"OH, THAT'S STRANGE."

"What?" Klaus, Five and Maria had convinced Lance to show them files of all the prosthetic eyes that had been made to see if the serial number on Five's glass eye matched. "Uh, the eye. It hasn't been purchased by a client yet."

"What? What do you mean?" Klaus had been sitting on top of the counter in front of Lance, purposefully making him uncomfortable. He hopped off the counter and came very close to Lance, clearly becoming more unsettled. "Well, uh, our logs say that the eye with that serial number...This can't be right. It hasn't even been manufactured yet. Where did you get that eye?"

Five walked out of the building in frustration and Klaus and Maria followed behind him. "Well, this is not good."

Five was clearly stressed about something, but Klaus couldn't have been more proud. "We were pretty good though right, Flower?"

"Right."

"Yeah, what about my consent bitch!" Five turned around clearly fed up with Klaus's immaturity. "Klaus, it doesn't matter."

"What-what-what's the big deal with this eye anyway?" Maria knew Five well, she hadn't seen him in a very long time, but if this was the Five she knew, then she figured it would be best to stay quiet so that she didn't say anything that would set him off. Klaus obviously didn't know that. "There is someone out there who's going to lose an eye in the next seven days. They're gonna bring out the end of life on Earth as we know it."

"Yeah, can I get that twenty bucks now or what?" Maria let out a little laugh and Five shot her a glare. As soon as he looked over at her she immediately stopped laughing. "Your twenty bucks?"

"Yeah, my twenty bucks."

"The apocalypse is coming and all you can think about it getting high?!"

"Well, I'm also quite hungry, tummy's a rumbling." Klaus put his hands on his stomach and flailed his fingers around while giggling. "I actually like Klaus's idea because you still owe me a coffee."

"You're useless, you're all useless." Five sat down on the stairs of the Meritech entrance and sighed out of frustration. "Oh, come on, you need to lighten up, old man."

"Yeah!"

"Hey, you know, I've just now realized why you're so uptight. You must be horny as hell!"

"Yeah-wait what ew!" Klaus walked over to Five and sat down next to him while Maria just stood awkwardly in front of them. "All those years by yourself. It's gotta screw with your head, being alone."

"Well, I wasn't alone." Klaus and Maria's head shot up with curiosity. "Oh? Pray tell."

"Wait! Was it the, um, Dana, no, umm, Debby, no wait...OH! Delores! That person you talked about when we were in the kitchen.!"

"Yes, that was her, we were together for over thirty years."

"Oh shoot, I thought he just banged her or something not getting married or any of that jazz." Klaus's mind started to go somewhere else. "Thirty years? Oh. wow! God. the longest I've been with someone was...I don't know. three weeks. And that's because I was so tired of looking for a place to sleep. He did make the most fantastic-"