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There was something about today that I did not like. Was it that I was just given a TICK bath and sprayed with some crap my mom found on sprayyourkids.com? YES. 

Only my mom knows to find websites that are as ridiculous as they sound. Looks like there are other mothers out there as over-protective as mine...

Anyway, Sam VOLUNTEERINGLY touched my shoulder today! My heart just kept racing and racing and racing throughout the entire scene. I never felt that with Carly. Why? because I was an amateur little kid in puppy love. But, it just isn't the same with Sam. I accidentally called her PRINCESS PUCKETT today when she offered some Salami to me today and I'm surprised I still have both my arms an my legs.

Wait... She offered Food to ME! SHE NEVER DOES THAT! HOLY CRAP! I'M FINALLY GETTING SOMEWHERE IN LIFE!!! I-


My mom suddenly barged into the room and I quickly hid my diary. Yeah... she doesn't know I have a diary. Nobody does! I mean, who would go out with a guy who has a DIARY?

"Freddie I'm running to get my ointment. I'll be back in exactly 37 minutes and 45 seconds" she said. Pretty Precise? I know.

"Oh-Okay" I just stammered back trying to hide the journal from her.

"But, I won't be home when you get back. Gotta go do iCarly in 5 minutes" I said. 

SHOOT! I GOTTA DO iCARLY!

I RAN OUTTA THE HOUSE TO CARLY'S PLACE YELLING " Later Mom!" I ran up the stairs and into the studio where I was greeted in the most 'polite' way ever by Sam.

"Took you long enough Fredwad! Where were you?" She yelled. 

There was no way I was telling her I was writing a diary. So, I came up with something I should have been doing.

"Sorry! I was watching the tech channel and they were talking about the new pear book 9 and how it can hold up to-" I began while setting up the website for the show.

"Nobody cares Nub!" she said.

"Just count down from five to one and start the show" Carly said trying to stop the argument.

"You don't say the one" I said mindlessly as I grabbed the camera while the girls got into the frame in position.

"In Five, Four, Three, two -" I pointed at them. Sam to be more precise. I always have but luckily, nobody noticed.

 Why? Coz she's my number 1.

" ... And this is iCarly now crank that whistle!" they yelled as Sam pressed the cheering button on the little blue remote.

I chuckled and continued to film the webcast.

"To start off the show" Carly began. "We're gonna have Freddie in a room alone with a tiger!" Sam yelled.

"Wait WHAT?" I yelled. 

"Calm your fudge... She's kidding" Carly said with a chuckle.

"But how awesome would that be?" Sam asked the viewers.

I rolled my eyes as they continued to entertain people with the usual crackery.

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