Big Dreams

Chapter 18: Home

When people usually used the word 'home' they often referred to the place where they were born and lived all their childhood at least but that always made me think. For me, 'home' was a word that resumed a series of requirements needed for me to feel safe and happy since 'home' is related to the feeling of comfort. The question I used to make to myself was 'What makes you feel happy and comfortable?' for which I think I had a very complete answer. I thought I needed a house where I could go every day to rest and be happy with everything inside: the people, the furniture, the view from the window. But also the place where the house was, the compound of the country, the city and its people: their beliefs, their ways of thinking, the kind of things they valued. I thought only with this set of requirements, I could say that I had a 'home' and I never felt like I had one.

Our first year in Canada was totally an adaptation so the second one was already going better starting with the new house. We had been very spared so we decided we would do our first serious vacation trip to London, a place we both wanted to visit.

- "We will have our vacations in the last two weeks of July so the plan is to go to London one week and then another week to Portugal" I explained to my family in a video call.

- "That sounds very good to me, Sara." my father said happily.

- "You will be here only for a week?" My grandma said with an angry face and then she started telling a story of one granddaughter of a friend of hers who didn't like the place where she was living and that spent every time she could in Portugal.

- "I will go there on Christmas too, which is twice a year. And as you see, even that girl who would like to live in Portugal can't do it if she wants to have a job."

- "So you don't plan to come back? Are you going to stay there for the rest of your life?"

- "I got out of there for many reasons including the fact that Portugal has no good offers for many areas of work and here I have a good and well-paid job as a pharmacist I'm living in a place that I love, doing what I like with the possibility to realize my dreams so no, of course, I don't plan to go back, I thought I had explained this quite explicitly."

- "This youth..." she whispered loudly enough for me to hear it.

- "Dad, I will call you later, I don't live in that house anymore so I don't have to tolerate her things anymore, I'm happy with my life and she has nothing to do with that."

- "You both need to calm down, let's change the subject, will you stay here?"My father asked.

- "No, I cannot stay in a house with her. We will stay with Martim and Marta in a house the 4 of us will rent for those days, they will go there in the same week so it's better that way".

I was angry because even miles away she kept criticizing me for doing my life.

- "It's unbelievable how she can think that way and say those things," I told Miguel.

- "Just ignore her and call Marta, I think we're going to stay with them after all." We laughed because we hadn't made a decision but when my grandma irritated me that way, I remembered the invitation that Marta and Martim had made and just said it.

The snow began to melt and the trees took on leaves as the summer approached. We were very excited about our trip to London and had already listed everything we wanted to visit. We landed on the 12th of June and went to the hotel to leave the baggage in our room, had breakfast and rested a bit considering we were very tired, after the long flight.

When we woke up, we started visiting the city. There were lots of really big parks and we could see couples having picnics, young people laying on the grass and talking, kids playing football and old people talking on benches; every one seemed happy.