Call Me Death (Fallen Series #4)

Chapter 17: If the World was Ending

Humans. I used to loathe them. No, up until now, I can't see myself being attached with them, given the fact that they can't see me unless they're dying. Humans are deceitful. And I consider them as monsters with a human body.

Who would trust humans? No one. Because they are all liars. But now, I'm starting to be like the ones I used to hate.

Pagkalabas na pagkalabas ni Reverie sa campus ay kinaway niya ang kamay niyang may hawak na papel. Paglapit niya sa amin ni Ariel, mas lalo pang lumawak ang ngiti niya, pagkatapos ay ipinakita sa akin ang test papers niya. Lahat ng 'yon mataas ang grades.

"Congrats," I said as I mess her hair. 

"Dahil matataas ang scores ko, papayagan na ako ni Dad at Mommy na..." May kinuha siya sa bulsa ng bag niya na parang brochure. "... mag-beach!" 

I smiled and took her bag. "This weekend?" Tumango naman siya bilang sagot. I got used to this now, kaya hindi na bago sa akin na tuwing weekends ay umaalis kami. Now, even being with her feels natural. 

And just like that, the weekend came. Reverie was driving while I was sitting on the passengers seat. Nakahiga naman si Ariel sa backseat. Tahimik lang sa loob ng sasakyan hanggang sa buksan niya ang radio. 

"How relaxing," she uttered while a random song was playing. We talked about a lot of things, more like we just didn't want the atmosphere to be awkward. She laughed while telling me all about her school experiences. Ikinuwento niya rin sa akin ang mga bagay na lagi niyang ginagawa. Like drawing, painting, reading, and a lot of stuffs that I don't know but I remained silent and kept listening. "Naalala ko pa rati, nalagyan ng paint yong mata ko, and I kept on crying, akala ko kasi mabubulag na ako n'on. Turns out, it's washable."

I slightly, chuckled. "You're really stupid since you were born, huh?" Napalingon ako sa kaniya pero namumula siya. "Are you sick--"

"You look good when you laugh." Sabay kaming natigilan at sabay ring umiwas. Yeah, I laughed. 

"I can't even remember the last time I laugh," I said without hesitation. I don't even know why I keep on making our conversation longer. Nang huminto ang sasakyan ay lumabas kami kaagad at bumungad sa amin ang isang resort na may fountain sa middle part. We went in and a lounge greeted us. Reverie went to the counter and Ariel sat on the couch. He looks exhausted even though he just slept the whole trip. 

Pagkabalik sa amin ni Reverie, may dala na siyang susi, it has a keychain with a number engraved on it. 202. It's our room number. Ipinakita niya rin ang susi niya. 210. "I'm in a separate room. Hati na lang kayo sa isa, a." Tumango na lang ako at umakyat na kami ni Ariel sa second floor at hinanap ang kuwarto namin. The room has two single bed and has a veranda. May isa ring bathroom at mini living room na malapit sa veranda. It's enough for the both of us.

I went to the veranda and the sea took my breath away. It was calm yet beautiful. I can see the sun that is about to hit the horizon. It's setting. May biglang kumatok kaya sabay kaming napatingin ni Ariel sa pinto. Pagbukas niya ay bumungad si Reverie na nakasuot ng denim short at see through na damit. She's wearing a bikini undearneath. Her pale skin is visible, as well as the bruises that are starting to fade on her belly, and on her shoulder. 

"Anong nangyari  sa 'yo?" tanong ni Ariel. Napansin din niya 'yong mga pasa. Reverie just shook her head while smiling.

"Wala 'to. Tara na. The sun is about to set, I want to see it, closer." Naglakad na siya paalis kay sumunod kami ni Ariel. Even though I want to ask, I couldn't. I just don't want to care more than I do now.

 There are people swimming and playing around the beach. Some are just sitting on the sand. Pumwesto kami sa medyo tago. Reverie sat, comfortably on the sand. I sat beside her and Ariel too. Pinagmasdan namin ang araw na lumubog. Ilang araw na ba ang pinagmasdan kong lumubog kasama siya? Until when will we be like this? Months? Days? Hours? I don't know.

When the night came, Reverie and Ariel made a bonfire. We talked about a lot of things and when Reverie got hungry, we ate. Pagkatapos naming kumain, Reverie stood up. "Wait, may kukuhanin lang ako."

We waited for her. Ilang minuto rin siyang nawala at pagkabalik niya, may dala siyang gitara. "Saan mo kinuha 'yan?" tanong ko na ikinatawa niya.

"I borrowed it on the counter. Puwede naman manghiram basta kapalit 'yong I.D. ko." She held the guitar and started strumming. How can someone be this good in everything? She knows how to paint, how to draw, how to use instruments. She has everything, so why is she always look lost? Like she doesn't know what to do. 

"You know this song, right?" Nagtama ang mga mata namin nang tanungin niya 'yon. Ako 'yong unang umiwas at umiling. "Then, I'll sing for you."

"Go ahead, I don't care." I looked away and focused on the calm sea but in my peripheral vision, I can see her eyes staring intently at me. 

"I know, you know, we know you weren't down for forever and it's fine." She kept on staring at me, and again, I feel like she's saying those words to me. Damn it. "I know, you know, we know, we weren't meant for each other and it's fine..."

"... But if the world was ending you'd come over, right?" Tuluyan na akong napatingin sa kaniya and she was smiling, but it wasn't because she's happy. In fact, it's the other way around. "You'd come over and you'd stay the night. Would you love for the hell of it? All our fears would be irrelevant. If the world was ending you'd come over, right? The sky'd be falling and I'd hold you tight. And there wouldn't be a reason why, we would even have to say goodbye..."

Her voice were as calming as the sea in front of me. It was soothing, but it was sad. "If the world was ending you'd come over, right? Right?" She stared at me as if she's asking me. 

"That doesn't make sense." Sabay kaming napatingin ni Reverie kay Ariel nang sabihin niya 'yon. "The song clearly says she wants to be with that someone, but won't talk to them unless the world is about to end. I don't get it."

I rolled my eyes. "You won't get it because you're stupid." Ariel glared at me. Natawa naman si Reverie at ibinaba ang hawak niyang gitara.

"Yeah, I guess you can put it that way. That even though she loves him, she won't tell him unless everything is about to end, and the guy as well. Because why would they even bother? They weren't down for forever, anyways." Nagkibit balikat siya.

"Why weren't they?" Ariel was curious. As if he really wants to know, and I, on the other hand, don't want to hear it anymore. 

 "Because they know that one day, they will lose the other person. So, what's the point of forever?" She shrugged it off and stared at me. "That part when the girl asked if the guy would come over if the world was ending, it's like a confession. Like she was saying that he's the last person she wants to be with when everything is ending."

Nang lumalim na ang gabi ay bumalik na kami sa cabin. Dumiretso ako sa veranda. I stayed there for I don't know how long, I want to clear my mind. For me to be able to grasp the situation I'm in. 

"Here." Nagulat ako nang may iniabot sa akin si Ariel. Hindi ko namalayang nakatayo na pala siya sa tabi ko at nakatanaw na rin sa dagat. "You can talk to Reverie using that. Smartphone ang tawag diyan."

He pressed something on the mobile at nang iniabot niya sa akin 'yon, narinig ko 'yong boses ni Reverie. I put it on my ear and Ariel walked away.

"Kakahiwalay lang natin, miss mo ako kaagad?" she joked. I stared at the moon, shining at the night sky. "Can't sleep, huh?"

"Yeah, I guess you can say that." Nanatili kaming tahimik pareho. Until she broke the silence.

"If the world was ending, you'd come over, right?" It was a question this time. Like she was waiting for me to answer. 

Instead of answering, I asked another question, "If the world was ending, why would you want me to come over?"

She slightly chuckled on the other line. Like she was anticipating to answer. It was her who said it was about confession. Why is she asking me that? "Because I want to see how you'd react if I were gone."

I thought about it a lot. How I will end her life. How things will end. But I never thought about how I'll feel if that day comes.

I don't know why, but that exact moment, I just felt something deep inside me. Like water flowing out from the faucet. I don't want to lie anymore.

Yeah, this is pain.

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