Tourette's || KuroKen

chapter 15 - goodbye & goodnight

The unsteady breaths echoed through the small hospital room. Slowly her chest rose, then fell, over and over. The mask covered half of her face, leaving her eyes out in the open. That mask pushed air into her lungs, which would soon fail. The heart monitor was at a slow beat, slowing down the slightest.

He sat in the chair next to her, his hair was unbrushed, his eyes were puffy with redness. It was too hard to cry, he had no more tears to produce, they simply would not drip away.

Kozume Kenma, a boy who would soon be without parents.

9:17 AM

"I'm sorry I left, you must have been worried." Kenma said with a monotone voice, trying to hide the remorseful tone he had.

He sat there with his hand in his mother's, squeezing it weakly. Also hoping she would have the smallest squeeze back.

"I'm sorry, for everything mom." Kenma croaked, "I was so naive."

He sighed, slowly turning his head to look out the big window. Rain.

"Oh look, it's your favorite time of the year, rain." He smiled, "I never really liked the rain, I also never understood why you did.." He laughed.

"This is probably why I'm naive." 

Kenma turned back around and held her hand tighter, it felt like the warmth from her hand was slowly dying away, becoming colder by the minute. Finally, a tear slid down his face, dropping onto his hand. His grasp strengthened, he felt angry, angry at himself.

"I.. don't know," His voice started trembling. "I don't know why you're leaving me.. why you smoked those horrible things, leaving you here."

He shut his eyes, letting more tears pour out. He gritted his teeth, struggling to say anything more.

The heart monster was the same as it was a couple minutes ago, slowly making tiny mountains across the screen. You have to make sad sights turn into pretty ones, right? Her chest rose and fell slowly, she looked peaceful. Her eyes were closed, the long eyelashes brushed under her eyes.

Kenma set his head down on the bed next to her side, "Why is it hard expressing myself?"

"You know I'm going to miss you, right?"

Small sobs filled the room. A couple hours passed, she still breathed out of her damaged lungs that would collapse.

4:31 PM

Kenma talked to her since early that morning, that heart monitor still made those small mountains.

A slight knock came to the door. Kenma perked his head up and quickly wiped his eyes, trying to hide the fact he was crying.

"Excuse me," A deep-ish man's voice said, they opened the door. A man in a doctors coat walked in, a clipboard was at his side. "Mr. Kozume?"

Kenma looked at him and nodded.

"Ah, yes," He let a small smile out, "So.. can I tell you her condition at this moment?"

Kenma gulped, "Sure.." He whispered.

The doctor walked closer to the bed and looked at his mother, then looked back to Kenma.

"So, your mother has lived longer than we had expected. She had passed the expectations since she had that stroke earlier, which caused the cancer to move quicker." He sighed and pulled the clipboard to look at, "I think she is just holding on, fighting against every urge to pass."

Kenma just looked at the ground, holding his mother's hand like a small child.

He flipped the papers on the clipboard, "We indeed were going to pull her off life support since, well, expenses. But that wouldn't come until tomorrow or the next day." He pursed his lips, "But as our research for her condition kept going, the cancer is getting too strong for her will to live." He shook his head and set down the clipboard.

Kenma bit his lip, holding in every sob he desperately wanted to let out.

"I will take me leave, I am deeply sorry we couldn't do anything more Mr. Kozume." He directed his eyes downward and slightly bowed.

Slowly the doctor walked out of the room and quietly shut the door. Once the door clicked Kenma's tears flooded down his face, he couldn't stop it no matter how much he tried.

"Mom.. i-it's okay, stop fighting through the pain, okay?" He trembled. "Stop acting strong all the time."

The rain started pouring harder, drenching everything that wasn't covered by something. What a horrible day to not bring your umbrella.

More minutes had passed, Kenma held onto his mother. He loved her more than anything, she raised him after his father had left for the military. He had died from an ambush aimed at his jet, completely destroying all evidence of his body.

"The world is so cruel." He softly said, dozing off.

7:27 PM

The sun had already set, but the rain kept falling. A small light was on in the room. Kenma was still asleep, finally resting his tired eyes.

His mother creaked her eyes open, they were blurry. Her chest hurt like it was on fire, the back pain was like her spine was fractured. She started to cough the slightest, trying to not wake her son up.

"Kenma.." She hazily said.

Slowly she pulled her hand from under Kenma's and set her hand on his head. She smiled weakly and pet his head, sliding her fingers through each strand of hair.

"You need to re-dye it.." She chuckled, which stabbed at her chest even more.

She felt her life slowly slipping away, it was harder to breathe. The oxygen being pushed into her nose was not being breathed in, it was to hard to expand her chest at this point. Her eyes dazed, slowly losing consciousness.

"Goodbye.. and goodnight.. my dear son," A tear rolled down her face as her lungs collapsed, spilling blood from her mouth.

Sadly the pretty view of the mountains depleted, they stopped. The mountains became smaller and more distant, same as the low beeping. That beeping turned into a loud noise, and the mountains flattened, leaving a large flat plain.

That loud buzzing echoed through Kenma's ears, alerting him awake. His eyes widened as he lifted his head, her hand slowly slid off his head, lifeless.

He was at a loss for words, tears rushed down his face. "Don't do.. this." He squeezed her hand, it was almost completely cold. "You cant be leaving me!" He scrambled up to his feet and shook her body.

Kenma saw her face, she was smiling, like she was happy to be dead, to be rid of this world.

He looked at the smile and sat down, he was in shock once more.

Slowly he got up and pushed the emergency button signaling something had been wrong in their hospital room. Then he exited the room, his eyes were blank as he dragged his feet through the hallway. The people rushing to his mother's room passed him, he just walked.

Finally, he reached the entrance of the hospital, he stepped outside and kept walking until he felt the rain fall on him. He only wanted to go outside in the rain for two reasons, one, nobody could tell he was crying, two, his mother loved the rain.

As he sat down on the bench in front on the hospital once more, he was already drenched. He curled up into a ball and dozed off to sleep, knowing he would catch a cold.

Goodbye and goodnight to my dearest mother.

Time of death, 7:30 PM.
Date of death, November 18th.