Flames of Cobalt and Crimson

The Recovery

Azriel

The first thing that registered was his scent, and when I opened my eyes I found myself in Cassian's bed. I immediately recognized his room, though I didn't know why I was here. I had a dull headache and my stomach felt like it had been hollowed out from hunger. I remembered the last moments of agony before I'd slipped into the darkness, and I laid perfectly still as I took inventory of my body. I felt a little weak, but nothing felt painful or immobilized.

My shadows were completely silent. I concentrated, trying to feel them, but there was nothing. I pushed down the dread, for now. There had been other times when my shadows had retreated after I'd been injured, but never before had they been turned against me. I would deal with that eventually. Cautiously, I wiggled my fingers and toes, and then turned my head to the side.

Cassian was asleep in bed next to me, those purple smudges back under his eyes. In his sleep, the corners of his mouth turned down slightly. I took a moment to admire the blunt lines of his face, but I had some immediate concerns to address.

I didn't want to awaken him, but I desperately needed to relieve myself in the bathing room and I didn't know whether it was safe for me to try to get up. I'd awoken from enough injuries to know better than to attempt to just climb right out of bed. "Cassian," I tried, but my voice barely rasped out. I worked my tongue against the roof of my mouth, trying for some moisture, and cleared my throat, coughing.

Cassian sat bolt upright and his eyes were on me immediately, as though he knew right where I was even in his sleep. Those eyes were bleak and red-rimmed, much as he had appeared when I had found him at the House of Wind. How many days ago was that, now?

They went wide with surprise, and then his face crumpled. Great, heaving sobs wracked his body and he wrapped his arms around me as carefully as though I were made of glass. I lifted my arms to fold around him slowly, pleased to confirm no pain there, either, and held him as he cried.

We didn't speak. I could feel soul-deep relief through the bond, the strongest emotion, with jumbled undercurrents I still couldn't entirely understand. We held each other as his breathing slowly eased, and I rubbed small circles on his back with my thumbs. When he had mostly quieted, I cleared my throat again.

"Uh, Cass? Sorry about this, but I need to get to the toilet pretty soon or I think I might die." He flinched, but sat up quickly, releasing me, and dashed the tears from his cheeks with both hands. He still didn't speak as he helped me out of the bed, but I could see his throat bobbing as he repeatedly swallowed hard, trying to master the emotions I could still feel.

I must have been unconscious for a while for him to be so upset, but aside from a little muscle weakness and general fatigue, I felt remarkably good, all things considered. I was having to concentrate to keep my wings up off the floor - something I normally did without any thought at all - but with Cassian to lean against, I was quite steady on my feet. I would find out what had happened once I'd emptied my bladder.

Cassian walked us right into the bathing room and angled for the toilet before I realized what he intended. I halted and gave him a smile. "I appreciate that you're willing to help me, but I've got this part under control."

He looked uncertain, his gaze darting from me to the porcelain bowl as if gauging whether he thought I could make the distance, and I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped me. The bleakness in his eyes receded a little further, and my heart tugged.

"Are you sure? I don't mind."

I gave him a smile. "Yeah, I'm definitely sure. Can you do anything to get me some food? I feel like I haven't eaten in days."