MARCH 20, 2019.
"Like what my new found Ate said earlier, ayon po ulit siya naka upo, Hello Ate Scarlet!" Turo ni Sabel kay Scarlet na halatang nagulat ng banggitin ang pangalan niya, mas lalo na ng ituro siya. "Ang buhay daw parang pagkanta minsan nasa tuno madalas ay sintunado, diba life sucks! Sometimes your happy yet most of the time your drown to loneliness." Sabel narrated seemingly aware of how hard this world can be. "And like my favorite quote from again my Ate Scarlet. Just sing along with life maybe by tomorrow, your rendition would turn bright. Well, after all, life gives us chances to set things right, so guys give it another try even if it's hard or in a slow process, you have to wake up from the dilemmas of life." Animo nagtutula siya habang nagsasalaysay. "Noon kasi madalas sinasabi ko kaya ko, mabubuhay ako na, ako lang mag-isa. Ang tapang ko masyado eh, not until i realized that loneliness is slowly swallowing me alive, ang hirap palang mag-isa noh?" She look at the crowd while biting her lower lips to prevent herself from crying. "May mga araw na akala ko i'm totally fine, kahit feeling ko okay ako deep down ang lungkot pala ng buhay ko, iiyak sa isang sulok pagkatapos mawawala bigla yung sakit, biglang okay na lahat. Since then I noticed that i've been behaving not myself, ganoon pala yung pakiramdam ng walang-wala, nothing at all, your dream, the genuine smile on your lips, the pure happiness you cherished and the life without sorrow all faded, pakiramdam mo sandali na lang susuko ka na, parang hindi mo na kaya, na ayaw mo na, gusto mo nang mawala, mawala nalang bigla." Salaysay niya, deretsong nakatingin sa harap ng maraming tao bakas rin sa mukha niya ang sakit at lungkot kahit ang mga tao sa loob ramdam ang lungkot sa mga salita niya. "I thought my anxiety and depression will eventually disappear if i fake a smile and just live my life like nothing is happening inside me. Hindi pala dapat ganon yun, kasi it was like pushing yourself in a cliff and you know that no one's there to save you, kasi sarili mo lang ang nakikita mo, sinking and dying." She sigh heavily and forcefully smile. Everyone is quiet even her family who's sitting in front look at her with sympathy, of all the people watching sila lang naman ang mas nakakaalam sa mga pinagdaanan nito and of course Scarlet who became her instant older sister. "I'm not here to raise awareness about this sickness nor to get your sympathy, gusto ko lang malaman niyong-- She paused and seriously look around the people. "Depression is not a joke." She continue. "Mental condition seems light on the outside but for those person who suffers from this sickness, it's a heavy thing for them, so please understand." Sabi niya pa habang pinupunasan ang ilang butil ng luha sa pisngi niya.
SCARLET
Birthday celebration namin ngayon ni Sabel. Ipinanganak kami sa magkaparihong araw at buwan. Ang galing ng timing noh? Parehong date rin kaming na hospitalize kaya mabilis kaming naging magkaibigan. We actually have the same story but different way of handling the situation. Tapos na akong mag-speech kaya siya naman yung nasa harap para paiyakin kaming nakikinig sa kwento niya. She turned 16 and I'm 22, very unlucky to celebrate our birthday inside this four corner hospital. Not totally bad cause our little birthday celebration was held outside, near the tree house where we became friends, we just put on decorations, tables and mini stage, mabuti nalang at maganda ang panahon kaya it turns out better and her family is around so i guess she wasn't unlucky at all. I should take back what i've said earlier, sorry it's as if i returned to that day.
March 20, 2013 (6 years ago).
"It's my 16th birthday today and I'm still here in school. I really don't care if they throw me a party or what kasi i used to not celebrate my birthday with a big crowd. It's more stressing than doing a project. I'm also not fond of surprises so better wrap it all or else i'll just freak out. I fix my things while waiting for Lima. Nagbihis narin ako para alis na kami deretso when he arrives. Manonood kami ng concert, yun ang treat niya for my birthday.
BINABASA MO ANG
Rendition
أدب الهواةA young singer, an artist, an extraordinary young lady with a stubborn personality and empty life. Creating her own masterpiece even though her life is like a piece of broken promises.
